Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 96046 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 480(@200wpm)___ 384(@250wpm)___ 320(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96046 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 480(@200wpm)___ 384(@250wpm)___ 320(@300wpm)
“I have to go potty,” my daughter announced.
Lucy stood. “I’ll take her.”
“Thanks, Luce.”
Lucy was my best friend here in Cincinnati. We’d met in a children’s clothing shop while pregnant with our kids and had been inseparable ever since.
I continued to look at myself in the ballgown as I reflected on how far I’d come in five years. After I’d moved back to Ohio from California, I’d been in a rough place for about a year, feeling really lost and alone. I never went back to art school and mainly just waited tables to pay the rent for my small apartment.
Then I’d met Casey, a software engineer who owned the single-family house across from my apartment. One night we were both taking the trash out at the same time, and we got to talking. That was the first time since Dorian that I’d felt a connection with someone. Casey was smart, kind, and came from a big, warm family who lived in town. They took me in and made me feel like part of a tribe. It was a sense of safety I’d badly needed.
Was it insta-love between Casey and me? Definitely not. Our relationship had grown over time. I did love Casey, but it wasn’t the frenzied kind of love I’d felt for Dorian. But experience had shown me that kind of love couldn’t be trusted as real—at least not in the way it was returned.
About a year into my relationship with Casey, I got pregnant after a condom broke at the most inopportune time. I’d gone off birth control after the Dorian breakup, vowing that I was done with men and done with the side effects of my IUD. So Casey and I had used condoms from the start. All it took was one breaking to change my life and bind me to Casey. He hadn’t forced the relationship with me, but it made sense to work on things for the sake of our child.
Rosie was my reason for getting up every morning. I was eternally grateful to have been given what I never knew I needed. If I’d had a choice, I might never have become a mom for fear that I couldn’t provide enough for my child. But sometimes the universe knows what you need before you do. I certainly never imagined I’d love being a mom as much as I did. And I thought I’d done a pretty good job of it thus far.
Lucy and Rosie returned from the bathroom, and shortly after, the attendant brought out two more dresses, one of which immediately caught my eye. It was strapless and fitted until just below the knees and had strategically placed feathers throughout. This definitely seemed more my style.
I pointed to it. “I’d love to try that one.”
After I put it on, I knew it was the one. “This is it,” I said as I looked in the mirror.
Lucy tilted her head. “Really?”
“You don’t like it?” I asked, immediately deflated.
“I think it looks gorgeous on you. I just feel like you haven’t tried on that many to make a decision.”
I shrugged. “When you know, you know.”
If only I felt that secure about the marriage itself. Was a piece of paper really necessary to prove a commitment? Casey and I had our daughter to link us forever. To me, that was greater than any legal document. But marriage and family meant so much to Casey. I also knew how much it would mean to Rosie when she was old enough to understand. Right now, she just knew there was going to be a big party to celebrate her mommy and daddy, and she’d get to wear a pretty dress.
“I’m sure,” I said. “I love it. There’s not one thing about this dress that I would change.”
“Okay, then.” Lucy smiled. “I’m so happy for you. And Casey is going to die when he sees you in it.”
“I don’t want Daddy to die,” my daughter cried.
“Oh no, honey. It’s just a saying. Don’t worry,” Lucy assured her, flashing me an apologetic look.
I looked down at my daughter. “Do you like this dress?”
She scrunched her nose, shook her head, and giggled.
“Not sure if I can trust that reaction, silly girl.”
After the woman took my measurements and some photos, she poured Lucy and me each a glass of champagne to celebrate saying yes to the dress. Orange juice for Rosie.
She put the champagne bottle on a side table. “Shall we go over to the bridesmaid selections now?”
I looked over at my friend. “Definitely.”
“How many in your wedding party?” she asked.
“Just Lucy and my daughter.”
“Did you want your daughter to wear a white dress?”
“I was thinking something like a mini bridal dress, yeah. Rosie will want something with a flowy skirt. And Lucy can select whatever color and style she likes.”
The attendant flashed me a skeptical look. “Shouldn’t you be choosing the color of the wedding?”