Total pages in book: 94
Estimated words: 91299 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91299 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
“Am I the only one?” His forehead furrows, and I see how important this is to him.
“Yes, fine, you know all my secrets. Kissed you freshman year and that was it.”
“Practically a kissing virgin.” His gaze dips to my lips. “And who was Sport Coat Guy last night?” His voice is softer now, his hand sliding around the nape of my neck.
“Who was she?” I ask.
“Not the person I want. But you already know that, don’t you?”
I nod. I do know that. He barely looked at her. And he sang my song.
“Who was he?” he asks again.
I lick my lips. “My advisor’s been trying to find me a nice Italian guy—”
“Did he find the right one?” His hand clenches in my hair, not hard, but enough for me to know that my answer matters.
“No. I can’t…” My voice breaks. “Blaze, you know it’s you.”
He’s turned toward me, our faces close.
My hand touches his shoulder tentatively then slides down to rest on his chest, over his heart.
“Your heart is beating fast.” My hand draws circles on the center of him, that vital part keeping his blood pumping. “What is this thing between us?”
Moving his arm, he presses his hand against mine. He leans down closer, our foreheads together. “This is me. This is my heart flying every time I see you. This is why I tried to let you go last fall…” He stops, his eyes closing for a moment then opening. “This is why I want your kisses all the time.”
He moves away, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a bag, opening it slowly and pulling out the small piece of paper inside.
“What’s that?”
“Your note. I keep it in my pocket sometimes. Had it with me that night at Cadillac’s. Had it with me at the library and the masquerade party. Had it last night.”
I inhale. “Blaze…”
“Let me finish.” He unwraps it slowly, and tears prick my eyes when I see how careful he is. “I love you, you wrote.” There’s awe in his voice.
I look at the hastily scrawled handwriting. I can’t breathe. I recall getting in my car when I clearly shouldn’t have been driving, parking at his dorm, trying to figure out what to do. I’d already cried my eyes out at the party. I was done with anger. I just wanted him to know what he’d fucking given up when he ended us, so I opened myself up on a gum wrapper.
He glances at me, searching my face. “I found it on my door after we broke up. Didn’t believe it, of course. Nobody’s ever said that to me. Not one person. Not even my aunt and uncle.”
My heart clutches at the thought of that. I touch his face. “Blaze—”
“Let me finish.” He takes a breath. “I just figured you were trashed and saying things you didn’t mean. I mean, we were just having sex—even though it felt like more, you know? Couldn’t throw it away, never in a million years. You wrote it. You said it…and I wanted to believe it.”
There’s a long pause.
“Did you mean it?” He’s staring at me, his breath seeming to halt.
I close my eyes as the word falls from my lips. “Yes.”
He doesn’t speak for a long time, and I open my lids to see him still looking at me, his expression full of wonder.
“I do,” I whisper.
He swallows. “I’m sorry I said those shitty words to you at your party, and I’m sorry everyone knew. It wasn’t what I really meant. I screwed it up, but we’re here. We can do this thing again. I don’t know how good relationships work, and I’m not good at talking except when it’s to run my mouth. I never know what to say…” He touches my chest, tracing the lines of my heart. “Everyone in my life ends up leaving me at some point. You won’t, will you?”
Never let him go. “I won’t.”
His lips land on mine, soft, and I sigh and curl my hands around his neck.
I’m taking this chance. I knew it the moment I walked out of that bathroom at The Purple Iris. I also know I’m flying close to the sun, brushing at the flame he is, but is life worth living if I give up on the most precious thing I’ve ever held in my hands?
26
I blink in the darkness, checking the time on the clock on my nightstand: five in the morning. Charisma is lying next to me. The last time she was here in the fall, we had sex and she left.
Not this time.
We fell asleep after talking and catching up. She told me about going to Nashville and more about her family. Will she let me meet them? Will they like me? Will her mom? Shit. Am I ready to commit to whatever this is?