Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 94119 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 471(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94119 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 471(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
A lump built in my throat. “That sounds nice,” I whispered. I rubbed my hands together. “Do you think it’s painful? Dying?” I turned to the pastor and looked him dead in the eye. I needed his complete honesty. “I can face death, I know I can,” I said. “I just don’t want it to hurt for…” Pastor Noel tipped his head to the side, waiting for me to finish. “For June. I don’t want her to feel any pain. I couldn’t bear it.”
Deep sorrow shone in the pastor’s brown eyes. He didn’t look much older than mid-thirties. And he seemed like a good man. Silas, Kate, and Cherry talked to him often, attended services every Sunday. I kind of wished I’d maybe talked to him more before this.
“I’ve been a pastor for ten years now, Jesse. And for five of them, I’ve worked with people in hospices or hospitals. In essence, I mostly sit with people as they pass.”
“So you’ve seen a lot of people die?” I asked.
“Hundreds,” he said.
I smiled at that. “You’re like a regular Texan Grim Reaper, huh?”
Pastor Noel laughed. “Believe me, I’ve been called worse.”
I laughed again, and even that small movement hurt my chest. It was strange thing to feel your body begin to fail you day by day, getting defeated by a too-strong opponent. “It must be a weird-ass job, watching people die, Pastor. No offense.”
“None taken,” he said. “But it’s actually really beautiful.” I raised a doubtful eyebrow at him, and he smiled. “I find the most curious things occur when people die. Magical, even.”
“Like what?” I asked.
“I’ve seen many things. The way some people, the second the pass, go with a smile upon their face. Peaceful. Happy. Like they are being bathed in healing light.”
My nose tickled, as I fought back the tears that brought to my eyes.
“The most curious to me is just as the person dies, they seem to see something in the room with them—or someone.” Pastor Noel held out his hand in reassurance. “Nothing bad. More like a familiar face. Like someone they loved is coming to meet them as they cross over. Or it could be an angel, guiding their soul to the next chapter.” He looked me in the eye. “Or maybe they are simply welcoming them home.”
A tear fell down my cheek and splashed onto my hand. I wiped it and caught sight of the drawing of June’s heart in my palm. Whenever they faded, I drew them back on. If I had been able to, I would have gotten it tattooed. But I didn’t think Neenee would allow us to hitch a ride to downtown Austin and get tattooed underage.
“I’m here for you, Jesse. For whatever you need,” Pastor Noel said.
“Thank you,” I said, truly meaning it, and stayed still and silent for a few moments more. I eventually got to my feet.
June would have had her meeting by now. Giving the pastor a farewell wave, I made my way back through the maze of hallways, only to find June standing at my door, waiting silently with her parents.
She heard my approach, met my eyes, and I instantly knew—just like me, she now had only weeks left to live.
Feeling every inch of my heart break, I opened my arms for her and allowed silent tears to pour down my cheeks. June wrapped her arms around me too, and I held her to my body, letting her warmth and her love seep into me while I still had it. June’s parents were holding each other up while simultaneously falling apart across from us. June’s dad gave me a sad smile, and I closed my eyes and just held my girl.
The first day I saw her, I knew June would change my life. I never dreamed that it would end this way between us, but I vowed to myself that, for as long as I breathed, it would be with the sole purpose of loving her.
And to die madly in love with my soulmate? In the end, I couldn’t think of a better way to go.
CHAPTER 25
Jesse
June’s head lay against my arm as I swung us on the egg chair. We were bundled up in a blanket, the night a little cold. I stared out at the millions of stars above us.
“What are you thinking?” June asked and glanced up at me. There was a spark missing from her deep-brown gaze. Her parents had sat with us for hours. They clearly hadn’t wanted to leave, but seeing that June wanted some time alone with me, her mom called it a night.
All of us were emotionally battered. My mom was arriving tomorrow, and she wasn’t leaving until…well, until there was no more reason for her to stay. She was bringing the rugrats too, and even just knowing they’d be with me made me feel a little stronger.