Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 101168 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101168 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
But this was not the time. They’d have that conversation when Edgar hadn’t just been trampled by his brother and perplexed by his aunt.
“It kills me to watch you suffer,” Jamie admitted for now. “It makes me want to burn the fucking world down to make it stop. But all I can do is be here for you in the aftermath.”
Edgar squeezed Jamie’s hand. They sat in silence for a while, and Jamie’s mind wandered to the first time they’d done burlesque. It was strange to remember that there was a time only about a year before when the idea of revealing their body to a crowd was one of the scarier things they could imagine. And how after they rushed offstage, they had an adrenaline high that lasted days. They’d felt, for the first time, in control of something that had previously felt like it controlled them.
What if Edgar could experience something similar?
“When I first did burlesque, it was really cathartic for me,” Jamie mused.
Edgar nodded politely, clearly unsure where this non sequitur was going.
“This is a little odd,” Jamie said. “But how would you feel about being a ghost?”
Edgar blanched. “Um. Like. After I die?”
“No. Like while you are very much alive.”
22
Edgar
“How the hell did I let you talk me into this,” Edgar groaned, looking down at the grayish-brownish makeup clotting on his skin. He was going for a light, jokey tone but didn’t think Jamie was fooled. He didn’t think Jamie was fooled by much.
They put both hands on his shoulders and looked at him steadily.
“Hey. If you don’t want to do this, you don’t have to.”
When Jamie had asked him the week before if he wanted to be a ghost, he’d assumed they meant as a therapeutic tool. But no. Here he stood at midnight, just inside the abandoned Six Flags amusement park, costumed and made up as the very thing that haunted him.
Edgar smiled at Jamie. He knew that they meant it. If he said right this minute that he wanted to wash off the makeup, take off the wig, and leave Jamie and Amelia one ghost short for the night, Jamie would kiss him goodbye and bear him no ill will. Which just made him that much more determined not to let them down. After all, what was the worst that could happen?
“I’m good. You know, I came here once as a kid. About a year before Katrina. My mom was on this ‘group activities’ kick for Allie, Poe, and me.”
Jamie scrunched up their nose. “Ick.”
“Yeah. Allie joined choir, but I can’t carry a tune.”
“You really cannot,” Jamie said tenderly.
“Poe found some group that, looking back, I think was probably churchy, but he didn’t care. He just knew they were going to Six Flags at the end of the summer, so he got me to join with him. I don’t think we ever went to the church part or did any of the stuff we were probably supposed to do, but come Six Flags day, we were in that van, ready to go. I don’t remember what we told Mom, but I think Poe got money from her for snacks and games. Hell, maybe he took it from her wallet.”
Jamie smiled as they continued applying Edgar’s makeup.
“Poe was so excited. When we got inside though, he realized he wasn’t quite tall enough to ride the big rides. He was a scrawny little kid. And he was furious. He used to throw these tantrums sometimes, and when someone would try to hug him or pull him away, he’d absolutely freak out. I didn’t want him to do that in the middle of Six Flags so I left him alone. He went off and came back taller.”
“What? How?”
“He’d gotten paper towel from the bathroom and wadded it up inside his shoes. Gave him that extra inch he needed.”
“Wow, that’s pretty diabolical for a little kid.”
“Yeah.”
His brother had always been good at getting what he wanted. He didn’t have any qualms about getting in trouble or disappointing people, an attitude that seemed to allow him the latitude he needed.
“He wanted to go on every scary ride. I…didn’t. But he would look up at me with this expression that—” He shook his head. Poe had been able to get him to do anything in those days. He’d been terrified to ride the big rides, but he hadn’t wanted to disappoint Poe. “But when we got to the front of the line and I saw the sign that showed someone too short flying out of the ride, I was terrified. I tried to pull him out of line, but he just looked at me like I was crazy, and there were people all around so I couldn’t really do anything. We sat down, and all I could think of was our car turning upside down on this roller coaster and Poe falling out and splatting on the ground.”