Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 101168 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101168 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 337(@300wpm)
Jamie.
The nurse had moved to stitch Allie up, and Jamie, the future ghost—no, no, Edgar could not think of them that way, because what was the point of living if you were just waiting to die, so stop it—took his hand.
“Are you okay?” Jamie asked, sliding their arm around Edgar’s waist.
Edgar tried to speak but couldn’t. Something was swirling around in his brain that he couldn’t examine too closely or it would slip away.
It was something so simple that it complicated everything he’d ever believed: ghosts were just people; people would become ghosts. His mind shied away from it, but something in his gut held fast. A baby just arrived in the world was like a ghost just gone from it. Both of them were helpless and confused and didn’t know how to do anything. Both were just trying to figure it out the best they could.
Edgar’s vision tipped, and the next thing he knew, he was lying on the floor, head in Jamie’s lap.
He blinked and saw concerned faces looking at him. “Did I…?”
“You didn’t faint,” Jamie whispered. “Just got all shaky and nonresponsive, so I made you lie down.”
“Oh.”
“Are you not good with the sight of blood? If so, you kinda picked the wrong seat.”
“I’m okay,” he said. It would be too much to explain right now, when he didn’t even understand it himself. “I’m good.”
He got to his feet with effort and walked over to his sister. His head was still swimming, and his head was buzzy, but he bent over and looked into the face of this brand-new person in his family.
“I can’t believe you just did that,” he said.
Allie looked up at him. “No shit, me neither,” she said peacefully.
“Have you decided on a name?” one of the nurses asked. She wore a beautiful blue headscarf over her box braids and seemed to have a voice made for speaking to people who’d just shoved babies out of themselves.
“Roderick Usher,” Allie cooed.
“Umm,” Edgar said.
“What the fuck?” Poe exclaimed.
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” Allie said. “God, you should see your faces.”
Jamie snickered.
“I haven’t decided yet,” Allie told the nurse.
The nurse smiled good-naturedly and put a clipboard down in front of Allie. “If you’ll just fill this out at your leisure,” she said calmly.
“Do you want me to do it?” Jamie asked, waggling a pen.
“Thanks,” Allie said. “I don’t know if this is one of those weird medical bonding things or if I’m just too tired to hold a pen, but I cannot let go of this thing.” She indicated the baby.
Jamie smiled at her and took the clipboard. “Okay.” They asked her a few questions, then. “Um, sex?”
“Female,” Allie said.
“I’d love you to have a daughter named Roderick Usher, to be honest,” Poe said.
“I dunno if they’ll be a daughter,” Allie said. “So I’m going to use they/them pronouns for them until they tell me what they prefer.”
“Oh, right, cool,” Poe said. “That makes sense.”
Edgar was watching Jamie. They were cradling the clipboard to their chest, and their expression was a complicated mix of joy and pain.
Edgar crossed the room and enfolded them in his arms from behind, pressing a fierce kiss against their head. He held Jamie as they answered the rest of the questions on the form, their usual neat block capitals just the tiniest bit shaky.
It was full daylight now, and the sun fell on the new member of Edgar’s family like a kiss. He and Jamie, Poe, Cameron, and Allie made a circle around the new baby, this new person just arrived in the world, as if they could protect them with the sheer force of love they shone down.
They couldn’t protect the new Lovejoy from everything. Edgar knew that they’d have their own battles and triumphs and loves and losses. The world was a harsh and scary place. But they could sure as hell try and make the world just a little bit better for them.
19
Jamie
The tunnel narrowed, and Jamie was trapped in the dark. They pushed at the heavy forms crushing them but found no way to free themself except turning back or moving through them. The air was warm and close. The muffled sounds of screams and scratching came from all sides. Jamie’s heart started to pound. Finally, after what felt like a Homeric journey, they pushed their way to freedom. But as soon as they were free of the maze, the ceiling began to dip lower and lower.
CRAWL IF YOU WANT TO SURVIVE, the sign said in glowing drips and fingerprints. Jamie dropped to their knees and crawled. Something brushed their cheek, and they flinched away. Spiderwebs. There was no light, no sense of which way was out. With multiple people attempting to escape, it would be even more difficult to navigate. They tried to climb over a body-shaped obstacle on the floor, but the ceiling was too low, the wood rough and dusty, and they ducked back down to find another route to freedom.