Total pages in book: 168
Estimated words: 160782 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 804(@200wpm)___ 643(@250wpm)___ 536(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 160782 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 804(@200wpm)___ 643(@250wpm)___ 536(@300wpm)
I look down and smile as my heart melts. “He said that?” I ask. “He said he wanted to marry me?”
She sits back and frowns. “From that whole sentence that’s the only information you took?”
I nod, embarrassed. “Sorry, carry on.”
“And then, not two weeks later, she sleeps with someone else and breaks his heart and I have to put him on a plane to go to the other side of the world alone.… and devastated.”
I swallow the lump in my throat as the horrible taste of guilt rises from my stomach. I look her in the eyes. “I never slept with another man, Margaret. I lied so that Joshua wouldn’t throw his life away on me. I knew he would never let me leave him unless I told him that and it has haunted me ever since. To this day, I have never had sex with another man.”
She goes silent and sits back in her chair in shock. “What, never?” I shake my head. Her face drops.
“I know this sounds strange to you, but Joshua and I are truly in love, and you have made us miserable with your venom. Joshua should never have to choose between us, Margaret. It is just not fair to put him in that position. I would never do that to him but you seem to do it easily.”
She drops her head. “I know.”
“And then you come to me after I let my father die telling me that we are not even related, when you have hated me for all these years. How do you expect me to react?”
She tears up as she looks at me. “Natasha.… I’m so sorry. I felt you were dangerous to Joshua. His love for you is all-consuming and I know that in all honesty if you left him again it would break him… and I was right. He took a cocaine overdose. But in the end when I saw him so miserable, I couldn’t do it to him any longer. I had to tell you the truth.”
I sit back in my chair. “Tell me, are you going to tell your son the truth about his paternity?” I ask as I raise an eyebrow in contempt.
Her face drops. “Natasha, please don’t judge me. After I had Scott,” she looks around the café to make sure nobody is listening, “Robert was working all the time and lost interest in me sexually. I was only twenty-two years old. He was away three weeks out of four and I was pretty sure he was having an affair. I was miserable.” The waitress arrives with our coffee. Margaret stops talking immediately. “Thank you,” she smiles. “We had a friend that used to come to the house regularly to check on me and Scott, at Robert’s request. He was my only friend at the time, and I came to depend on him. His marriage had temporarily broken up and we leaned on each other for support. We talked a lot, and often he would come over and then stay for dinner. We were both very lonely. One night after a few wines he told me that he used to fantasize about me.… sexually…. when he was alone in bed.” My eyes widen as I imagine the situation she is setting for me. “I was totally shocked and asked him to leave immediately. But I couldn’t stop thinking about it. It haunted me, Natasha. I was in my sexual prime and I was married to a man who saw me as a mother to his child and nothing more. It was a very difficult time for me.”
“I can’t imagine what it would be like to be married to someone like that,” I whisper. She smiles. “You will never have to worry about that. The chemistry you have with Joshua runs too deep.” I give her a thankful smile, she didn’t have to say that. “Anyway, I thought about it for two whole months and in the end, I was fantasizing about him in my bed as well. I wanted to feel wanted, I wanted to feel desired. Robert went away for four months and as usual our friend would call daily to check on me. The sexual tension between us became unbearable and one night he kissed me on the lips goodnight. I got nervous and asked him to leave, but he didn’t. He stayed out in his car for four hours while I paced inside, distraught at what I was about to do. When he knocked again at two in the morning, I didn’t have any resistance left.
I broke Natasha, I gave into temptation. We made passionate love every day and night for a month. I fell totally in love with him and when Robert was due home in a few weeks I told this man of my intentions to leave Robert so we could be together.” I sit back in shock, this is not the story I expected. “He told me to not be a fool and that he was going back to his wife.” She tears up at the memory.