Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 101887 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 509(@200wpm)___ 408(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101887 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 509(@200wpm)___ 408(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
“So ya don’t have random things ya do just to decompress?”
“Not like I used to.”
“Why is that?”
“I … I lost my uncle. When he was alive, I spent most of my free time with him. He taught me everything I know. Because of him, I’m nearly fearless.
“Ach, nearly?”
“I might have one or two fears I haven’t overcome just yet.”
“What are they? Maybe I can help.”
“Thanks, but no thanks. Rule number one: Never speak your fears out loud. You never know who’s listening.”
I grin as I remember Freddie once saying the same thing in front of me. I hadn’t realized how much I missed the old man. I kept busy after hearing of his death.
“Anyway, it’s just … he was everything to me. He took me all over the world with him. I miss him and our deep conversations. Life made so much sense when he was around.”
“I’m sorry for yer loss.”
“It’s okay. I’m dealing with my grief my own way. It’s all good.”
“Aye, grief is a bitch of its own kind,” I say and rub at my chest.
I’ve been wearing mine for twenty-some years whether I’ve acknowledged it or not. I guess the family business has been where I’ve chosen to deal with it. Dean and I are a lot more alike than I thought.
“How long ago did you lose him?” I ask as I clear my throat.
I know when her uncle died, but she’s talking, and I want to keep it that way. I can hear the fondness in her voice for Freddie. He was the type of man you held in high regard.
Ruthless, but honest and wise. In the short time I got to know him, I had some of the deepest conversations of my life. He often kept me from making bad decisions.
I learned to mind my temper from him—something we McGowans aren’t known for. I can’t help wondering if that’s something Dean was able to glean from him. I come out of my thoughts as she begins to speak again.
“It’s been, what? About four or five years now. It seems more like yesterday.
“It was so sudden and unexpected. The man would run with me every morning. He was as fit as any man half his age.
“It just never made sense to me. I couldn’t remain in New York after his passing. I moved to PA to keep from losing my shit. I just—”
She cuts off and turns to look out the window. I can feel her shutting down. That was a lot more than I thought I would get, so I let it go.
I fall deep into my own thoughts. I like Dean. She’s bright, gorgeous, and I like her sense of humor. However, I don’t believe I’m what she needs. I’m just as fucked up as she is.
Dean
Something has changed with Ronan, but I can’t put my finger on it. I know I shouldn’t care or be so invested in his thoughts or feelings, but I can’t help myself. Something about this man keeps drawing me in.
I was excited when he texted to tell me he had returned. All week, I have questioned what kind of work keeps him traveling so much, but I would never ask. That’s his business.
I don’t want him asking me the same. Nothing about me is as it seems. Another reason I don’t date.
How do you explain the late-night calls to handle some asshole who has lost his mind and became disrespectful? I can’t explain away a lot about my life. Nor do I care to.
Uncle Dayton and Uncle Percy would have a coronary if they knew I left my men back home during this trip. I came to babysit a four-year-old; there was no need for muscle to come with me. Besides, I’ve made my point about fucking with me.
I’ve earned respect as my uncle’s replacement. I know he still has some business partners whom I haven’t met yet, but in time, I will make myself known to them. I’ve been trying to play soft for just a bit longer while I wait for the right time to arrive.
I don’t need a publisher. I’d be fine writing as an indie author. However, the deadlines force me to focus on writing and take my mind away. Gabby and Lauren ruined that for me.
This trip hasn’t done enough to save them. Who am I kidding? I haven’t taken anyone off my hit list yet. Not even my sister.
“We’re here. Stay right where ya are, I have a gift for ya,” Ronan says, bringing me out of my thoughts as he places the car in park.
He hops out and heads to the trunk. My instincts kick in and I reach for my bag. I refuse to get caught slipping over some dick.
When Ronan comes to open my door, he has a luxury shopping bag in his hand. To my surprise, he squats outside the car and coaxes me to swing my legs out.