Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 80102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 401(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 401(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
“Did you give it a real chance?”
“More than a real chance. I skated with three of the guys on the team and then went out with them afterward. They’re great guys, and the arena they play in is insane. I mean, it’s no TD Garden but still amazing. The offer to skate with them at their next training camp is without a doubt a great opportunity, but not when my heart isn’t in it. My heart belongs somewhere else.”
Rainn shakes his head. “What if I move to Scranton with you?”
My eyes widen. “What?”
“I mean, I’ll need to finish my degree, but it’s only one year. I could move there next summer, and—”
“You’d do that for me?”
“Whit, I’d do anything for you. Anything.”
My heart feels full. “I don’t think you know how much I needed to hear that, but Scranton’s still not for me. It’s not just you I’d be leaving behind, but the farm, my family—my entire life.”
“I’m not going to pretend I understand turning it down, but I am going to be thankful you won’t be leaving Vermont.”
I take a small step toward him. And then another. “Why’s that?”
His lips quirk. “I think you know why.”
“Not really.”
“Not seeing you, not being able to text you, not having the courage to tell you I’m sorry until I did something about my life … It’s been hell, okay? I didn’t want to be the reason you didn’t do something, and you’re right, I did push you away. But not because I don’t want to be with you. I pushed you away because I’m scared.”
His confession surprises me. Actually, this whole conversation is not going the way I thought it would.
“What are you scared of?” I ask, my voice low.
“I’m scared of putting myself out there again. Of plans not working out. My heart getting broken. I’m scared if I tell you I love you, you won’t feel the same way, and then I—”
“I do.”
His gaze flicks to mine. “Really?”
“It’s why I haven’t so much as let myself touch you tonight. I’ve been preparing myself for rejection because big plans scare you, and love? Deciding to spend your life with someone? That’s the biggest plan of all plans.”
“It is. But something you said before you drove off and left me on the side of the road—”
“Calm down. I left you outside your apartment, not in the middle of nowhere.”
Rainn smiles. “That’s not how everyone else will hear about it.”
I laugh. “Of course it’s not.”
“Something you said then made me think. About the bar. My life. How long I’m going to continue to be bitter. I realized if I truly want something with you, which I do—I really, really do—I can’t delay my future any longer. I want to be happy. And I want it all to happen with you.”
I can’t take it anymore. “Can I please touch you now?”
Rainn takes me off guard by practically slamming into me. His arms go around my waist, and his mouth lands on mine.
I stumble backward but hold on tight to his broad shoulders and wide back.
He licks into my mouth and moans.
My back slams against the door of his car, and then Rainn’s there, boxing me in. He doesn’t stop kissing me even when he pulls away to murmur how much he’s missed me.
This can’t be real life.
I can’t be this lucky.
“Rainn,” I breathe.
He puts his hand in his pocket and pulls out his car keys, unlocking the doors with the fob. “Get in the back seat.” His voice has a serious growl to it, and I’m quick to comply.
I lie across the wide back seat, but my feet have nowhere to go and end up in the footwell. “It’s small.”
“Hey, at least it’s not a Fiat.”
I laugh. “True that.”
Rainn climbs in and closes the door behind him.
Back seat, two large hockey players, it doesn’t make for a comfortable hookup, but right now, I don’t care.
My cock is hard and aching for him even after the shortest of kisses.
I look up into his eyes as he settles above me. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
This time when he leans in to kiss me, his lips are soft, and it occurs to me I’m in love with the first person I’ve ever been with. While that fills me with some sort of hesitance, it has nothing to do with Rainn or us or how I feel about him.
Your first love is supposed to be your first heartbreak. That’s the way life works. He’s not supposed to be the perfect guy—the one who was made to be yours.
What Rainn and I have is deeper than I thought I could ever find in a lifetime.
Rainn moves on top of me, his hard cock rubbing against mine through our pants. “Fuck, Whit.”
I burst out laughing. “What did you call me?”