Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 84114 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84114 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
“Gray left a letter,” I blurt.
Lucky lifts an eyebrow. “What kind of letter?”
“The kind that upended my entire world,” I mutter, and Lucky’s eyes flare wide. “It was for both me and Maddie and he wanted us to read it together after he was gone.”
Lucky knows a little about Maddie. Mostly that she and I butt heads all the time and aren’t all that fond of each other.
“And?” Lucky prompts when I don’t keep going.
I let out a heavy breath. “He asked me to help Maddie raise Grayce. Not just help—but be her dad.”
Lucky whistles through his teeth as he sits back hard against the booth. “Holy shit.”
“Yeah.” I huff a bitter laugh and rub my neck. “That’s about the response I had too.”
“Dude. That’s… I don’t even know what that is.” His gaze cuts away for a second. “And he wants Maddie to be her mom?”
I nod. “Apparently, they’d worked that part out before he died and she happily agreed. But she didn’t know that Gray wanted me involved until we read the letter.”
“Jesus,” he drawls in disbelief. “What are you gonna do?”
I meet his eyes, the weight of it pressing down. “I don’t know. That’s why I’m here. Gray was always the one I went to when I needed to figure out my shit. Now he’s gone. My parents…,” I trail off, jaw tightening. “They’ve never been there when it mattered, so I can’t talk to them. Who the hell am I supposed to ask?”
Lucky doesn’t flinch at the bitterness in my voice. He just nods. “So you came to me.”
“Yeah.” The word’s gruff, almost embarrassed. “You sort of know what the dynamic is between me and Maddie and you’re my closest mate on the team, so I figured you were the best sounding board.”
For a minute, we sit in silence, the clink of dishes and low murmur of other diners filling the air. Then Lucky leans forward, forearms braced on the table.
“All right. Pros and cons,” he says. “Lay it out like we’re matching up against a tough opponent.”
I huff a laugh. “Like we’re game-planning.”
“Exactly. Except instead of lines and matchups, it’s diapers and daycare.”
I can’t help it. My mouth twitches but then I quickly sober. “Pro… honoring Gray. He trusted me with this, and I don’t want to let him down.”
Lucky nods. “That’s a big one.”
“Pro… Grayce. She’s his kid. A piece of him. And I…” My throat tightens. “I want her to know who he was and what he meant to me, to the world. I could give her that.”
We keep going, sipping on our bourbons as if it will fuel our creativity.
“Another pro,” I say after a long sip. “Stability. Maddie’s already been in Grayce’s life since day one. If I step in too, she’ll have two anchors. Maybe that keeps her from feeling like she’s missing something.”
Lucky nods, tapping the edge of his glass. “Kids thrive on consistency. At least that’s what Winnie says and trust me, she knows kids. Two steady hands on the wheel instead of one, that’s a big deal. I came from a single-parent home and I can’t tell you how important that can be.”
I shift in my seat, feeling the truth of it settle, glad I chose Lucky to share his perspective. “And, I could give her opportunities Gray never could have. Travel, private school, anything she dreams of. I don’t mean spoiling her, but making sure she never feels limited.”
“Financial security,” Lucky says. “That’s no small thing.”
“Right.” I pick at the edge of my napkin. “And it keeps her connected to Gray’s world. To me. She’d grow up knowing her dad wasn’t just some story. I could tell her so much.”
Lucky tilts his head. “That’s three.”
“Four,” I correct automatically. “Family. Real family. I don’t have parents I can rely on. Maddie apparently doesn’t either, but I don’t know much about her background. But Grayce would never feel that hole if we both stepped up. She’d know she’s surrounded by people who chose her.”
Lucky leans back, lips quirking. “That one’s strong, man.”
I drag a hand down my face. “And maybe… maybe it changes me. Forces me to be more than just a guy who plays hockey and lives for the game. I don’t know. Being a dad—it could make me better.”
Lucky grins faintly. “I personally think you’re fine the way you are, dude, but nothing wrong with personal growth.”
“Yeah,” I mutter, shaking my head. “Sounds so damn cliché when I say it out loud.”
“Doesn’t mean it’s not true.”
I let out a breath, heavy and uneven. The list of pros is growing, and it feels harder to keep pretending I don’t see the scales tipping.
“Let’s talk about cons,” Lucky asks gently.
“Cons…” I rake a hand through my hair. “Everything else. My career. The playoffs. I’m not ready to be a dad. I wouldn’t even know where to start. What if I screw her up? What if Maddie resents me? Hell, she already resents me. And on top of that, what does it even mean that we’re both raising Grayce? Does that mean Maddie stays in Chicago and I parent from afar? Just write checks?”