Touch of Hate Read Online J.L. Beck, Cassandra Hallman

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Dark, Forbidden, Mafia, Romance Tags Authors: ,
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Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 125465 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 627(@200wpm)___ 502(@250wpm)___ 418(@300wpm)
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Maybe even worse—and I know why.

River.

The thought of him makes me growl into my pillow. This is all his fault. He’s the one who got Ren started on this in the first place, stirring up the past and feeding his rage. And he’s the one who’s been absolutely impossible to deal with ever since he found out Rebecca and William and the others are still alive and breathing.

Why he can’t get off his ass and take care of this himself is beyond me.

I have my theories, though, and one of them involves setting Ren up to take the fall. River doesn’t want to be the one with his ass on the line, risking arrest, or much worse, should the cult leaders decide to take matters into their own hands. It’s much safer to urge Ren, to berate him and insult him, to tell him he has no balls and no commitment.

Not that I’ve heard it for myself, but from what I’ve heard Ren shouting in reply, I can imagine. At one point, he did tell his brother to do it his own damn self if he had such little confidence, which I’m sure had River backpedaling.

But not for long.

I’m the one who has to deal with the fallout, and I’m getting sick of it. If I had that jerk in front of me now, more than a few words would be exchanged.

I don’t think he’d enjoy the outcome.

There’s a reason Dad used to call me a spitfire. Why he more than once sighed in defeat and mourned the man who believed himself up to the challenge of taming me. I’d make River wish he could crawl into a hole and stay there once I finished with him. After everything he’s done to make Ren’s life miserable? He deserves it and so much worse.

The very thought of him makes my stomach churn again. I don’t think deep breathing will help me this time—bile begins rising in my throat, and it’s all I can do to stumble to the bathroom and drop to my knees in front of the toilet before my stomach begins heaving in earnest.

I hate him for this. For making our lives miserable. For turning Ren into someone I hardly recognize sometimes.

For forcing Ren to plan another trip to Reno.

The idea of it leaves me leaning over the bowl again, emptying all the foul bile in my stomach until nothing’s left but to heave painfully with no result. After a minute or so of shaky breathing, it seems like the worst has passed, so I flush the toilet before standing on trembling legs and turning on the water in the sink.

I’ve been like this for the past week, maybe ten days now. It started not long after we returned, and Ren announced we’d be going back soon. The idea of sneaking into that bleak, foreboding place twisted me up, and I’ve been that way ever since.

Who could blame me? It wasn’t enough for us to almost get killed or at least caught? To watch Ren blow a guy’s brains out? I’d never seen anything like that before and hope I never do again.

The blood and brains on the tile…

I need to stop thinking about it. It’s bad enough I’m sick every morning, throwing my guts up. Hopefully, Ren will find something to help me with it. He offered to grab ginger ale and saltines while he was out, too. Even though I only ever feel this way early in the day, and it normally passes before lunch, I figured it couldn’t hurt.

My tooth brushing slows, and I lift my head, eyes wide in the reflection, face pale.

Only in the morning, only for the past ten days or so.

When was the last time I got my period? Before coming here, back at my parents’ house. It’s been more than a month since Ren took me.

I told him he couldn’t come inside me because I’m not on birth control.

That hasn’t stopped him.

Am I pregnant?

My hand trembles. The toothbrush drops into the sink, but I’m only vaguely aware of that in light of the shock waves rippling through my brain. I cup my boobs, staring at them in the mirror. They’re a little tender.

I’m not making this up in my head.

I might be pregnant. I’m almost sure of it, in fact. Why else would I have all these symptoms? Now I wish I had gone with Ren so I could get a test. I wish I could call him to ask for one. Now that the possibility is there, I want to know for sure right away.

A baby. Our baby. The start of our family.

Tears fill my eyes while my hands slide down to rest over my belly. I can’t wait to tell him. I know he wants a family as much as I do.


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