Total Chaos (Love and Lyrics #3) Read Online Nikki Ash

Categories Genre: Contemporary, Drama, Erotic, Romance Tags Authors: Series: Love and Lyrics Series by Nikki Ash
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Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 79553 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)
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So I’m not tempted to say fuck it and fuck her, I flip us over to put her under me. She wraps her legs around my waist and pulls on the hair tie holding my hair up, making it fall and create a curtain around us as I kiss my way down her neck, peppering kisses along her exposed collarbone and shoulder. When she uses the heels of her feet to force me closer, I stop kissing her flesh and sit up.

“Why don’t we watch an episode of The Vampire Diaries?” I suggest. There isn’t a television in the room, but I have my laptop, and right now, I need a damn distraction before I’m balls deep in her.

Her brow furrows in confusion. “You want to watch TV?”

Taking her feet, I untangle her legs from around me, then drop onto my side next to her. I lift her leg over my thigh so we’re still partially connected.

“Do I want to? Fuck no,” I admit truthfully. “But you only just walked away from your fiancé…and”—I look her in the eyes, so she knows how serious I am—“I don’t want to be your rebound.”

“Dec…” She sighs, and my heart drops, knowing from her tone that whatever she’s about to say isn’t going to be in my favor. “I want you… I’m attracted to you, and even though I can’t remember the past couple of months, I feel something between us. I wouldn’t have written a song like ‘Drunk on Your Love’ with just anyone. But we can’t ever be anything more than friends.”

“Because you don’t think you’re capable of more?”

“Because you’re best friends with my brother, close to my family, and when I mess it all up, they’ll be forced to choose sides, and while you’re like family, I am family, which means they’ll choose me… even though I won’t deserve it.”

“So what is it you want?” I ask, already knowing the answer but hoping I’m wrong.

“Well…” She shrugs, and her cheeks tinge pink. “I was thinking while we’re on this trip we could… you know…” She smiles shyly.

“We could what?” I push, wanting to hear the words.

She huffs. “We could have fun.”

“We are having fun.” Yeah, I’m giving her a hard time—I’m not about to make this easy on her.

“You know what I mean.” She slaps my chest playfully. “I like you, and as I said, I’m attracted to you, but I can’t be who you want me to be. You’re Mr. Perfect, Mr. Romantic. Everyone knows that. Even the women you’ve dumped have nothing but nice things to say about you. But I’m just not capable of more, and I don’t want to lead you on. So if you don’t want to have fun while on this trip, I completely get it, but if you do, I’m down. But that’s all it can be… fun.”

Fuck, this woman. I don’t get it. She’s gorgeous, rich, and has the most amazing voice. She’s the music industry’s pop princess, not just because of all that but because she’s also sweet and sexy and funny. She’s the spokesperson for several charities that focus on various issues like domestic abuse and music education. She’s a hands-on aunt with her brother’s kids and a wonderful older sister to her siblings.

She might be flaky and all over the place, but if anyone needs her, she’s there and would do anything for anyone. I’ve literally watched her take the jacket off her back and give it to a woman who was freezing on the streets of LA during a cold night without thinking twice.

But beneath the surface, she has such low self-esteem and thinks so little of herself. She has it stuck in her head that since she hasn’t met the right guy yet, it means something is wrong with her. She doesn’t see what everyone sees. She doesn’t understand how goddamn lovable she is. And I’m going to make it my mission to show her, but in order to do that, I need time with her. If I push the whole making her mine thing, telling her I want her forever, she’s going to run. It’s what she does. This means I will have to go along with what she thinks she wants… for now. Give her, her fun while showing her how amazing we’ll be together. And hope, when we return to New York, it’s enough for her to give us a real chance.

“Okay.” I say what she needs to hear. “We’ll do it your way.”

“Really? You’re okay with just having fun?” she asks speculatively.

I grip the curve of her hip and pull her over to me. “Yep.” I press a chaste kiss to her soft lips. “But I still think we should wait a little bit. We have our entire trip ahead of us, and you did just get out of a relationship… Besides, half the fun is the foreplay.” I shoot her a playful wink that has a shy smile stretching across her face.


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