Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 88501 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 443(@200wpm)___ 354(@250wpm)___ 295(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 88501 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 443(@200wpm)___ 354(@250wpm)___ 295(@300wpm)
“Not Declan?”
“Declan has more sense than this…usually. Parker, though, knocked some of that good sense out of his head.” Simon made a noise that sounded like a laugh, and I took that as a good sign. “The point is that I take care of my friends. You’re hurting. I hope you’ll let me help you.”
“And you’re not hurting? The thing with us? Whatever happened with you and Sawyer? You expect me to let that go and not help you?”
My stomach tried to knot, but it felt like a halfhearted effort. He was pressing more and more, tying our problems back to his brother. He wasn’t wrong, but he was getting too close to the truth. Common sense said that I should keep my distance, but maybe I was tired of running and hiding. It might be better for the truth to come out and have him reject me once and for all. But not yet.
“One problem at a time,” I murmured. Once I got Simon steady again, I could blow up my own life.
19
SIMON MILLER
Nothing was going how I had planned it to go.
After leaving Rome’s penthouse, I’d returned home to make a plan of how I would lure Pierce into an evening of dinner and drinks under the notion of us moving into being friends and closing the chapter on our silly fake dating scheme. At the end of the night, I’d take him home, where he felt safe and comfortable, and there I would corner the bastard into coughing up the truth about what had happened between him and my brother. I might have even considered an option that included handcuffs.
In the worst-case scenario, I’d been prepared to back off and keep up the facade of just wanting friendship with him. However, I’d planned to slowly wear him down over a period of months until he caved and admitted he had feelings for me. I didn’t like playing the long game, but for Pierce, I would scratch together every scrap of patience I possessed and do it.
However, before I could put my plan into motion, I’d heard from the director of the symphony. I was supposed to have turned in an initial draft of the concerto I was writing specifically to be played by the CSO. It was how I’d weaseled my way into the orchestra in the first place. It wasn’t enough that they got the privilege of having me play for them, but they also wanted the honor of playing my first ever composed piece.
But I had nothing to give them.
There were scraps. Sections I’d written and immediately tossed aside. The writer’s block was intense. I couldn’t concentrate. My insecurities were eating me alive. Not to mention, I was allowing myself to be distracted by Pierce. I was so fucking close to finally winning him. Letting up now would be disastrous.
Yet I’d had to put my pursuit on hold so I could come up with something to give them. Of course, the harder I’d worked, the more my brain refused to cooperate. I’d locked myself up in the house and refused to come out, refused to even look at my phone until I got something on paper.
It was just my luck that it had been Pierce who’d found me in such a state. Who would want someone who was such a mess? Pierce was the epitome of careful control and composure. He was always perfect. Every time he opened his mouth, the right thing came out. He wasn’t embarrassing or ridiculous. I could do that too. I could be a perfect match for him.
There was this other side to me, though, that wasn’t perfect. The side that never knew what to say. The side that eventually fell apart under all the pressure. I’d thought I could keep that hidden from him. At least until he was so deeply in love with me that he could deal with the fact that I sometimes crumbled into useless shit. He wasn’t supposed to see this side of me now.
The entire ride to his house was silent. I curled up in the front seat, my head resting on the cold window. The world became a blur as we rushed along the highway. Part of me wanted to scream and cry against his gentleness and understanding. Why did he have to be so wonderful? I couldn’t remember the last time someone had seen me in such a state. But he didn’t flinch away or try to escape. He just held me tighter.
Pierce broke the silence in the most unexpected way as we pulled down the long driveway to his home. “I was going to put you in my bedroom, but if you would prefer your own room…”
I blinked, my brain struggling to register the words he was saying. His room? He knew where I stood on things, what I wanted from him, and he wasn’t trying to keep me at arm’s length.