Total pages in book: 401
Estimated words: 390373 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1952(@200wpm)___ 1561(@250wpm)___ 1301(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 390373 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1952(@200wpm)___ 1561(@250wpm)___ 1301(@300wpm)
Heady heat flooded my veins and between my thighs. Gods, I wanted him. And that need emboldened me. I reached between us, my palm slipping over the hard ridge. I felt him spasm inside his soft leather breeches and practically melted.
“Fuck,” Casteel groaned, his hips rising. “Poppy.” One of his hands closed around mine, and my stomach curled low and tight at the thought of him guiding my hand over his length. The pang of desire was so intense that my breath stuttered and—
Casteel pulled my hand away. “That’s not why we’re sitting here.”
My eyes popped open in surprise. Stunned, I watched as he lifted my hand and brought it to his lips.
He kissed my imprint.
I tried to speak, but my throat constricted and nothing came out. Was he…rejecting me?
“I want you to talk to me, Poppy.” His eyes met mine.
Stiffening, my fingers curled around nothing. “But that’s not what I want.”
“It’s what you need.”
“No.” My gaze dropped to his lap. “That’s what I need.”
“Poppy,” he grunted, his chest rising sharply. “You’ve been through a lot of shit in a short period of time. You killed your mother.”
“I’m fine with that.”
“Then you fell into stasis, where a psychotic Primal god was able to get into your head,” he continued. “You woke up to learn that you’d been under his influence, then were pulled to another realm, only to witness its destruction.”
“Haven’t forgotten that,” I said.
His eyes narrowed slightly. “You fought an Ancient. Without me,” he tacked on with a low growl. “That alone is a lot to deal with.”
“Are you done listing things I remember?”
“No.”
“Great,” I muttered.
“Then there was Stonehill. Then Tawny. Then Lowertown,” he went on. “And now, all of this.”
I didn’t want him to continue, so I decided to quiet him the best way I knew. I lowered my mouth to his.
Casteel caught me by the shoulder and held me back. “And you just found out that your—fuck,” he said, and my stomach once more felt like it curled inward. He shook his head. “You just learned that you lived only the gods know how many lives.”
“I know.” I rocked back, swallowing hard against the knot forming in my throat. “I was there for the conversation.”
He ignored my snarky retort. “It has to have messed with your head.”
“Did it mess with yours?” I blurted before I could stop myself.
Casteel didn’t answer immediately.
When he did, the one word he uttered was like a sucker punch to the chest.
“Yes.”
CHAPTER 40
POPPY
Yes.
The word echoed my heartbeat as I stared at him.
“How could it not?” Casteel asked.
Now, those four words joined the pounding.
“Of course,” I murmured, rapidly blinking as I scooted back.
I knew what I needed now. And it still wasn’t to talk. It also wasn’t him. It was distance. Space.
He tilted his head, his hands moving to my hips to stop me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I gripped the arm of the couch, but he held on. “Can you let go?”
“No.”
“Let go.” I met his stare and let the eather surface enough to charge the air. “Before I make you let go.”
An eyebrow rose, and a heartbeat passed. He slowly lifted each finger as he held my gaze.
Scrambling off him, I stood and stepped back before bending to pick up my glass. I took a large gulp of whiskey and immediately regretted that life choice. The burn hit like fire and clawed its way down my throat, causing my eyes to water and my lungs to seize.
“You okay?” Casteel asked, the corners of his lips twitching.
“Yes,” I wheezed.
“Sure sounds like it.”
“Shut up.” I turned and made a face as I glanced down at the whiskey. I was never touching it again.
“I think that was karma,” he continued. “For you not answering my question.”
My grip on the glass tightened. “Of course, you would think it was karma.”
“Poppy.”
I stepped onto the raised platform, mimicking his tone when I said, “Casteel.”
His sigh was impressively loud. “Talk to me.”
I set the glass on the table and walked to the map of Solis as I searched for something to say that had nothing to do with what he wanted. Luckily, I found it. “Aren’t we supposed to meet with your brother?”
“We will.”
“We should do that now.” I kept my gaze on the map. “And seriously consider having a public address to assure the people they are safe and talk about the things that are happening in the realm. You know, like the sun.”
“We will discuss that once we talk.”
“We are talking.”
“Not about what we should.”
“No.” I ran my fingers over the hilt of the steel dagger holding down one edge of the map. “We disagree on what we need to discuss.”
“That doesn’t change that we need to talk about it.”
“Hmm?”
“Don’t pretend you’re actually invested in that map, Poppy.”
My jaw ached from how tightly I clenched it. I closed my eyes. A small section of my thoughts was operating somewhat logically. I had been through a lot. And I did have many things dropped on me. Stuff I didn’t think I could truly process even if given a lifetime to do so. Casteel was concerned. He was being gentle and caring. Thoughtful. Loving. My brain told me all that. But my heart…