Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 66518 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 333(@200wpm)___ 266(@250wpm)___ 222(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66518 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 333(@200wpm)___ 266(@250wpm)___ 222(@300wpm)
“You sound like a proud papa.”
“I am. Where are you right now? It looks like a workshop.”
I panned the phone around to show him my surroundings. “This is my bedroom. I have a shared studio on campus, but I do a lot of work from home.”
“So I see.” He shifted a bit, in a way that made me think he was tucking his feet under him, and said, “You know, you left me with an unanswered question last night.”
“Did I?”
He nodded, with a little smile playing around his lips. “I asked why you always wear black, and you said you’d tell me later. But then we fell asleep and didn’t get to continue our conversation.”
“Oh, that’s right. I always wear black because to me, it’s a mark of success.” I leaned against the wall beside my bed and pulled a blanket over my legs as I explained, “When I started modeling at fourteen, I still dressed like a kid. I’d wear T-shirts with cartoon characters on them, along with baggy jeans and hoodies. But then, all of a sudden, I found myself in the world of high fashion.”
“That must have been strange.”
“It was like I’d crash-landed on a different planet. During runway shows, I’d be dressed in the most outlandish things. I’ll never forget one show I did where they put me in a see-through white blouse, platform heels, and tiny metallic shorts. Then they glued feathers around my eyes and stuck a gilded birdcage over my head.”
“You’re kidding.”
“Nope. I have a photo somewhere that was printed in Italian Vogue, of myself and two other models walking the runway in those birdcages.”
“That’s…”
“Weird, I know. Runway shows are meant to be attention-getting, so they’ll dress the models in all sorts of bizarre stuff. That birdcage is just one example, but it stands out because it was one of my first runways, and I felt ridiculous. I also didn’t love how much of my pale, skinny little body was on display in those short-shorts and that sheer top, but that’s another story.”
“I would have felt so self-conscious, especially at that age.”
“Exactly. But anyway, while the models were dressed in ridiculous getups, the designers at those shows were almost always dressed head-to-toe in black. There were a few exceptions. A handful of designers would wear a print or something to complement their collection, but at least ninety percent of them defaulted to all-black. That made a huge impression on me, because these were the bosses, the people calling the shots. I quickly learned to equate dressing in black with being the one in control. On top of that, I think it looks sophisticated and classy. It’s practical, too. Everything I own matches. That means I can get dressed quickly and still look pulled together.”
“That all makes perfect sense.” He scratched his short beard and said, “It’s wild that you had this big career, starting at such a young age. When I was fourteen—well, I told you what I was like.”
“Yeah, a little rebel.”
“Pretty much. While my methods left a lot to be desired, I’m not sorry that I pushed back against my controlling parents. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have ended up with the life I have now.”
“You seem like you’re happy with where you ended up.”
“I am, for sure.”
After a pause, I muttered, “Sometimes I wonder where I’d be now if I’d stood up for myself when I was fourteen.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s not like I jumped at the chance to be a model when that scout discovered me. I was a shy kid, and it sounded awful to me. But my parents, especially my mom, saw dollar signs and insisted that I do it. I tried to tell her I didn’t want to, but she wouldn’t listen.”
I shifted the phone to my other hand and added, “I don’t want to make her out to be a monster. She’s not. But my parents have always been extremely focused on making money, so when someone offers you a high-paying job, you take it. Whether or not you like it or actually want to do it is irrelevant.”
“That’s not great.”
“I know. You have to put it in context, though. My parents were both immigrants and my mom grew up in poverty, so I get why my modeling career was important to her. She wanted me to have a better life than she’d had. I just wish she’d thought about how it would affect me. It forced me to grow up way too fast, and sometimes I found myself in situations I really wasn’t prepared to deal with. For one thing, it’s creepy and super uncomfortable to get hit on by people more than twice your age when you’re still a teen.”
There was anger in Ryder’s voice when he said, “Damn it, I hate that you were put in those situations.”