Total pages in book: 67
Estimated words: 63174 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 316(@200wpm)___ 253(@250wpm)___ 211(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63174 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 316(@200wpm)___ 253(@250wpm)___ 211(@300wpm)
I took a sip of coffee as I considered the question. Then I said, “I think Devon’s a pretty complicated person. He really does seem to be happy most of the time, and he’s all about living in the moment. At the same time though, he truly believes his days are numbered, and I don’t get it. He’s logical in other ways, so why does he whole-heartedly believe in that curse?”
Belinda sighed softly before telling me, “I’m pretty sure he chooses to believe it because it alleviates some of his guilt.”
“What does he feel guilty about?”
“The death of his father.”
“He told me he was four when his dad died. How could he possibly feel guilty about anything?”
“He shouldn’t. It was my fault, not his.”
I put down the mug and said, “His dad died in a car accident. It couldn’t have been your fault, either.”
“It was, though,” she said softly, her hands fidgeting with her apron strings. “My husband had gone out that night with friends from work to celebrate a birthday. Devon wasn’t the easiest kid, and he was pitching a fit about going to bed. He kept insisting that he wanted his daddy to tuck him in, not me. I ended up calling him at the restaurant and asking him to come home early.”
She looked devastated as she whispered, “I was just so tired. All I wanted was for Devon to go to sleep, so I could, too. If I hadn’t made that call, his father never would have been in the intersection when that truck ran a stop sign.”
I squeezed her hand and said, “You can’t blame yourself for that. It was an accident.”
“You don’t have to comfort me. I’ve learned to live with my guilt. Devon never did though, and it ate away at him. He kept saying his dad would still be alive if he hadn’t been acting out. Nothing I said could change his mind. Neither could the school counselor, or our minister, or the therapist I was able to hire for him after Ed and I got married.”
I whispered, “I had no idea he was carrying that around.”
“It’s not something he likes to talk about.” She pushed her hair off her forehead with the back of her hand and said, “Oddly enough, the only thing that seemed to ease his guilt a little was when he met with that psychic. When she told him the men in his family were cursed, he felt like he finally had an explanation for why his dad was taken away from him at such a young age. He still felt guilty, but not in the same way. Now his father’s death was bigger than him. He latched onto the idea of a curse with both hands and wouldn’t let go, and just like with his guilt, no one could talk him out of it.”
That explained so much. It was like the puzzle that made up Devon finally had a few more pieces in place.
“I could never understand why Devon was so determined to believe in something that defies logic, but I get it now,” I said. “As wildly improbable as it is, it has to be better than feeling responsible for his father’s death.”
“Exactly.” She shifted her gaze to a spot off in the distance as she told me, “Some part of Devon always wanted to believe in magic, and in things that defied explanation in this world. I used to think it was charming, before this curse thing came along and took over his entire life.”
“What should I do? There’s the rest of December and all of January to get through. How do I keep him from completely imploding? And what’s he going to do when his birthday comes and goes and he realizes there was no curse?”
She shifted her gaze back to me and said, “Just keep being there for him, Kit. I have no idea how he’s going to be as his birthday gets closer, or how he’ll react once it’s passed and he realizes none of what he believed was real. All I know is, he’s going to need you to help him through it.”
I nodded. “Like I told Devon last night, I’m not going anywhere.”
14
Devon
It felt great to be back in my hometown, and what made it even better was getting to share it with Kit. Even though we spent most of our time with my mom and Ed, I also carved out a little time for just the two of us.
A highlight was spending an afternoon with him at the aquarium. He was so excited, and I loved watching the way his face lit up at one thing after another. “This place is wonderful,” he said, as he hugged my arm and we watched a bunch of tiny jellyfish propel themselves around their tank. “Did you come here as a kid?”