Total pages in book: 184
Estimated words: 188108 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 941(@200wpm)___ 752(@250wpm)___ 627(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 188108 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 941(@200wpm)___ 752(@250wpm)___ 627(@300wpm)
“It would still be too beautiful for me,” she told him quietly. “Because anything would be too good for me after what I did.”
There was silence.
Finally, they understood.
Although she didn’t know why they hadn’t understood that before.
“Are you saying you won’t eat this food because it’s too good for you?” Salem asked quietly.
“Far more than I deserve. I don’t deserve any of it.”
“That’s why you haven’t been eating?” Roman asked.
She glanced up at him. Why did he look like he was in pain? Was he remembering all of the stuff she’d done wrong?
Was it giving him a stomachache? She had a stomachache too.
She nodded.
“That’s utter bullshit,” Alexei spat out. “Is this . . . are you punishing yourself by not eating?”
Tamsyn frowned. “I didn’t think of it like that. No. No, I’m not because when I’m punished everything is forgiven afterward. And everything can’t be forgiven. Because what I did was too terrible to be forgiven. I don’t understand why I’m here and why you’re so concerned about me eating. Shouldn’t you want me to starve? Shouldn’t you kick me out? Yell at me? Why am I here?”
Roman glanced over at Salem. “Fix. This. Now.”
Salem stood and she couldn’t help but flinch back. It wasn’t like she really thought he would hurt her. But she wouldn’t blame him if he did.
He stalked around to where she sat and moved her chair so she faced him.
To her shock, he reached down and lifted her onto her feet, walking her backward until she hit the wall. Then his hand came out to rest lightly on her throat.
Unlike the other times when he’d done this, there was no heat in his eyes, he didn’t hold her loosely.
This was firm.
It was dangerous.
A pure threat.
So he’d finally figured out what to do with her. They had come to the conclusion to take her out.
All she hoped was that they made it quick. She forced her body to relax, to not fight back. She hoped that instinct didn’t kick in, although it might.
Closing her eyes, she tried to slow her breathing, but it was so fast and loud.
“Open your eyes and look at me.”
No.
That wasn’t what she wanted to do. She didn’t want the last thing she saw on earth to be the hatred he had for her.
“Pet, we can wait all night for you to open your eyes.”
Pet?
That made her open her eyes more than anything else would. He tightened his hold on her. “Are you owned?”
What?
What was he talking about?
“Are you owned, Pet? Do I own you?”
She still didn’t understand. Why would he want to own her?
“I don’t know.”
“Yes, you do. Are you owned, controlled, protected? Are. You. Mine?”
There was a throat clearing behind him.
“Salem is using the wrong word,” Roman said. “He means are you ours?”
That . . . that had come from Roman? She had been expecting him to protest that they couldn’t own her.
“I don’t understand. How can you want that now? After everything?”
“You are only to answer the one question, Pet. Are you owned by us?”
She didn’t know what it was for a start, thought her eyesight was going weird. It became all blurry, hard to see. Then the tears drifted down her cheeks. One after another.
“She’s crying, Salem,” Alexei said.
“I see it.”
“She never cries,” Roman added, sounding panicked. “Maybe you should let her go.”
Salem kept his gaze on her.
Steady. No hesitation.
“No. I’m not going to let her go. Letting her go is actually the last thing I want to do. Is it, Pet? Because that’s not what you want or need. What you need is for me to hold on tight. Because you’re scared and you’re uncertain and you’re deep in the self-blame game. So what you need to do is give it all to me.”
She shook her head.
“Yes. I can stand here all night until you admit the truth. That you are owned. And until you give all that self-loathing and self-pity and anger to me.”
A sudden fury took her by surprise, washing through her and making her hot. She grasped hold of his wrist with both hands, tugging at him.
She could take things further. Force him to let go.
Well, try, anyway.
However, there was no way she ever wanted to harm him.
“Let me go.”
“Give it to me,” he demanded.
A strangled noise of rage left her lips. “Why? Why would you want it?” she cried.
He lowered his face toward hers until his lips were mere millimetres away.
“You aren’t paying attention. Because you’re mine.”
“You don’t want me anymore!” She stomped her foot, the tears coming hard and fast as Salem drew his face back.
Was this them messing with her? Were they going to pretend that they wanted her, then laugh in her face as punishment?
It seemed cruel.
But also fitting.
“Would you be here if we didn’t want you anymore? Don’t you think we would have walked away?”