Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 138775 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 694(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 463(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138775 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 694(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 463(@300wpm)
I waited. Part of me wanted to yell at him for presuming to know anything about her. About us. Another part of me needed to hear what he had to say—and at the same time, didn’t want to.
“It’s hard to crush someone, especially when you care about them. So you start to think that maybe it’ll be easier if you get them to break up with you. I’ve done that a time or two with a woman, and I’m not proud of it. I think Natalie wanted to sleep with me so that you’d dump her—and then she’d be spared the pain of having to dump you. Which I know you don’t want to hear it, but that seems pretty fucking cowardly.”
“You’re right, I don’t want to hear it.”
“Right. Because it’s much easier on you if it’s all my fault.”
Shit. He was saying exactly what Tori had said to me that night after she’d kissed all of us at the library study group. That didn’t make it true, though.
Except now there was one person I trusted—and the one person who knew my history with Natalie—both saying the same thing.
“Why did you lie? Why’d you say you slept with her and take the blame?”
Kyle sighed again, resting his forearms on the table. “The one thing I never doubted was that you loved her. I knew you’d be crushed that she cheated or tried to. So the way I saw it—you could end up hating the girl you loved, or you could hate the guy you already couldn’t fucking stand. So I figured that might be a better option for you, though both sucked.”
That was a lot to process, and I didn’t want to believe it. But the logical side of my brain was resurfacing through the anger. What would the last year and a half have been like if I’d blamed Natalie instead of Kyle? It would’ve added new and awful layers to the incredible pain I felt after the breakup. Shit. “So I’ve spent the last eighteen months hating you for something you didn’t do?”
“Well, yeah. That was the plan. But don’t forget, we didn’t get along before that, either. So it’s not like we would’ve been best buds if she hadn’t come to my room.” Kyle’s voice was flat, as if it didn’t matter.
But it did. “Maybe… without that with Natalie… maybe we would’ve eventually grown out of it. Or gotten past it somehow.”
He looked doubtful. “Blended families suck under the best of circumstances. And you and I already didn’t like each other when our parents met, so it wasn’t great even before they got married.”
“I had a role in that,” I said softly. “I played up to your dad. Emphasized my achievements. Downgraded yours.”
“I didn’t fucking have any, except on the field.”
“Still… I threw you under the bus. My dad died when I was just a kid, and it felt good to have my new stepfather be proud of me. But having it be at the expense of his son—that was a shitty thing for me to do. Selfish, too.”
Kyle looked out the window. “The way you just described it makes it sound like that was on my dad as much as you. Maybe you wouldn’t have tried to throw me under the bus if I hadn’t been so mean to you at school.”
“Either way, it’s not something I’m proud of.”
“Me either.” He picked up his coffee cup, only to realize it was empty.
“So, what do we do now?”
“I don’t know. I guess you take some time to process all this shit I just dumped on you. And I guess I probably should talk to Tori about what she wants me to do. And at some point, if you’re still willing, you look into the audio file or whatever it is you have to do.”
“All right.” That was what I’d do then.
40
TORI
Never, in all my life, had I shared a bed with someone until recently. Therefore, waking up next to another person—especially a man—was a new experience.
And I loved it. I couldn’t say exactly why. Sometimes they hogged the covers. Sometimes they woke up with morning wood—which was a term I hadn’t even heard of until I moved in here. But it was just so amazing to wake up next to someone I liked—and who liked me. And to touch them and hold them—and have them touch and hold me.
The small windows in the basement didn’t offer much in the way of natural light, but that gave me an excuse to snuggle up next to Jayden. My alarm hadn’t even gone off yet, so I had time. Plus, it was Saturday—a good day to sleep a little late.
Things had worked out better than I expected in the last few days. Lucas was able to provide proof that the recording of Kyle saying those awful things was fake. It was a huge relief to know that my faith in Kyle hadn’t been misplaced.