Total pages in book: 115
Estimated words: 107254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 536(@200wpm)___ 429(@250wpm)___ 358(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 107254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 536(@200wpm)___ 429(@250wpm)___ 358(@300wpm)
The words get lodged in my throat, and I’m about to say something when Autumn comes in with Landon in his stroller. “Hey,” she greets us, and I smile over at Lucy. “There she is,” she says and looks at me, and I raise my eyebrows. “Are you having fun with the horses?” Autumn asks Lucy, who lightens her grip on my hand. “I was going to see my friend at the donut shop and then go to the park and thought you might want to come.”
“Oh, fun,” I state, trying to make Lucy look at me so I can see her eyes, and she does. “They have the best donuts I’ve ever had. They are this big.” I pick up my other hand and show her. “Can you bring me back one?” She looks at me, then at Charlie and then Emmett, before looking back at Autumn. She nods and lets go of my hand, and my fingers absentmindedly move to grab her hand back. But she walks away with Autumn with her head down. I watch Charlie look at me and then look back at Emmett before he follows Autumn.
“Thank you,” Emmett says, walking into the horse stall with me.
“There is no need to thank me. She’s amazing,” I say, and my phone vibrates in my back pocket. “I think she would love to ride,” I suggest, and he nods at me the same way his daughter did to me not too long ago. “I can take her.”
“No,” he snaps. I try to hide the hurt, but I’m afraid I’m not fast enough. He says something, but I hold up my hand.
“I understand.” My eyes get dry, and my nose pinches. Before I lose it, and he sees how much that hurt me, I walk away from him. “I’ll see you later.”
Chapter Nine
EMMETT
I watch her in front of me, her eyes lighting up when she talks about Lucy. “There is no need to thank me.” Her soft smile comes out, making her even more beautiful. She is always beautiful, but when she smiles, it simply takes my breath away. “She’s amazing.” She fidgets with her hands, and I can see she is nervous about something. She looks down and then looks back up at me. “I think she would love to ride.” I nod, agreeing but still not able to say anything. “I can take her.”
“No,” I snap. When I do, I see her eyes shield over, a look that shows me how hurt she is by my tone. A tone I use with her all the time, a tone I’ve used so she wouldn’t know she was getting under my skin.
“I understand.” Her voice sounds like it’s dead, monotone, and not there. My stomach tightens, and I fucking hate it. “I’ll see you later.”
She turns to walk out of the stall. “Lilah,” I shout, and she stops in her tracks, “wait!”
She slowly turns around to face me. “I didn’t mean it like that,” I start to say and run my hand through my hair. “I mean, I didn’t mean to snap.”
“But you still meant that you don’t want me to take her riding,” she replies, and I nod, “because I’m reckless.”
I close my eyes for a beat, hearing my own voice in my head telling her she was reckless so many times. “No.” I shake my head. “Because I want to be the one who does that with her.” I take a deep breath in. “She hasn’t said a fucking word to me since I met her.” I close my eyes, trying to fight back the emotions coursing through me. Emotions I thought I didn’t have since I grew up hollow and empty. Emotions that are so foreign to me, I think there is something wrong with me. Emotions I have no idea what to do with.
“Which was?” she asks and I don’t even think I can look at her when I tell her, the shame might be just too much for me to bear.
“Six days ago,” I reply and she gasps. I finally look up at her and see her with her hand to her mouth. “She said one sentence to me,” I admit. “Am I going to have to live with you now?” I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut. “That’s it. Then it was nothing, not a peep, not a sound. Nothing but nods and shakes.” My voice trembles on the last word, and I stop talking to clear the lump from my throat. “Then I come to find you two, never expecting to hear her voice and then her laughing.”
“Emmett.” Her voice is in a whisper, and I’ve had dreams of her saying my name in that tone. Dreams where she would smile at me while she looked into my eyes and said my name just like she did. Dreams I would wake up from and wish were real. Dreams I feel were stolen because they weren’t supposed to be mine.