Total pages in book: 28
Estimated words: 27474 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 137(@200wpm)___ 110(@250wpm)___ 92(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 27474 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 137(@200wpm)___ 110(@250wpm)___ 92(@300wpm)
But how can home be anywhere but with Sebastian?
Too shaken to stand any longer, I lower into the chair again, fighting tears. “Please…I don’t want to be separated again.”
The day I watched him leave the estate from the window of my prison—thanks to Miles locking me inside his horrible quarters—was one of the lowest moments of my life. That was the day I crashed so low I thought about jumping off the balcony to end my suffering.
I told no one about that moment, talked to no one about the stark fear that followed the urge.
An urge so strong, it still haunts me today.
“You’re separated every month, my sweet girl.” Liam points out the obvious in a gentle tone, which only irritates me more.
“You know what I mean.”
“I do know what you mean, but you’re going to be okay. We’re all here for you, and they,” he says, pointing at Sebastian and Tatum, “are going to make sure that piece of shit can’t hurt anyone ever again.” Liam clasps his hands in front of him on the table. “If it were me, I’d want to do the same. They need to do this for you, so let them.”
“What about what I need?”
Sebastian grips my hand again. “I’ll call you every day.”
“It’s not enough. I want you there with me, even if I can’t see you or touch you. Just knowing you’re in the tower with me…” Tears spring to my eyes. “It sounds insane, but it makes me feel close to you.”
“It’s not insane, baby. I feel the same way, but I’ll be back before you know it.” His teeth tug on his lower lip. “I failed you at that party…I won’t fail you again.”
“You didn’t fail me.” I squeeze his fingers, knowing that nothing I say will make him believe otherwise. “And you say we’ll talk every day, but I don’t have access to a phone. Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“You can use my cell,” Liam says, his voice quiet. Pained. He’s trying so hard to set aside his feelings, but he can never shelve his heartache completely. One look into his umber eyes, and I know it’s ripping through him.
He’s here because he loves me, and he’s letting another man claim the job of lover and protector because he knows it’s what I want.
What I need.
Suddenly, his blackmail doesn’t matter anymore, his ultimatum inconsequential after everything I’ve been through these past few days. The last thing I want is to spend my final day in Los Angeles angry and resentful.
I meet Sebastian’s eyes. “If you’re forcing me to leave tomorrow, then we have to make today count.”
“What do you have in mind?”
A day on the town sounds exciting and fun, but all I have the energy for is a relaxing afternoon on the couch with the sexiest man alive.
“How about a sci-fi movie marathon and a ridiculous amount of junk food?”
A smile tilts up his mouth, but it doesn’t quite reach his troubled ocean eyes. “I think we can make that happen, princess.”
14
Compared to Los Angeles, Zodiac Island is damp and frigid. Instead of a temperate climate that brings sweater weather into style, we plunge into the harshness of winter. Rain pelts the ground in a relentless assault, and the bare trees shiver in the icy wind, their desolate branches starker than I recall.
And that wind carries a bite, chafing lips and setting teeth to chattering. I clench my jaw as Liam escorts me into the circular hell he has the nerve to call home.
This place will never feel like home without Sebastian’s presence, and no matter the familiarity of my old quarters in the House of Aries, returning to Liam’s floor unsettles me to my quaking bones, despite him embodying the role of protector, friend, companion.
On that first day back, he’s quiet, almost distant, using work as an excuse to avoid me. I’ve never felt so abandoned, especially in the dead of night when I wake up screaming and thrashing in the sheets, fighting off some faceless creature hovering over me in the darkness.
Since then, I’ve taken to sleeping with a light on, not that it helps much. The nightmares visit without fail, and it isn’t until the third night that I get a reprieve. Liam crawls into bed next to me, and I sleep, undisturbed for the first time since leaving Sebastian’s arms.
It’s become a habit, the chancellor claiming the right side of my bed, always there but never touching. Always the perfect gentlemen, safeguarding my virginity so he can steal it on my birthday.
The irony is more than I can stomach, but I’m not about to ask him to leave, since the steady rhythm of his breathing reminds me I’m not alone.
Because when I’m alone, my world falls dark and silent, transporting me to places I can’t handle. Terrifying places of blanketing suffocation and racing thoughts. Heart palpitations and trembling limbs.