Total pages in book: 36
Estimated words: 34065 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 170(@200wpm)___ 136(@250wpm)___ 114(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 34065 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 170(@200wpm)___ 136(@250wpm)___ 114(@300wpm)
Her eyes go wide, her face full of surprise. “Of course I would. We’re in this together. I love you and want to help you with your burdens. Why would you think I’d let you do that on your own?” Her grip on mine is impossibly tight. “You’re not alone.”
For some reason, I start crying even as laughter bubbles in my throat. I love her so much, and the absurdity of our conversation both makes me feel better and worse. “Alone has never been my problem, Simone. I’m a clone.”
I let the word hang in the air. It feels dangerous even to speak it aloud. Like now that I’ve said it, something terrible will happen.
Simone keeps eyeing me patiently. “Aren’t your friends clones, too? The men with the tattoos?”
“The a’ani. And they’re a different kind of clone. The registered, legal kind. That’s why their skin is red. Someone cloned me and my sisters under the table and tried to pass us off as real humans, and that’s why it’s a problem. I’m not legal, and if I’m caught, they’ll destroy me. So I basically need to hide out and hope for the best.” Tears keep streaming down my face. I don’t know why I’m crying. I’m not sad. It’s the emotion of finally getting the words out, and the anxiety over her reaction. Simone hasn’t gotten upset so far, but I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop. For things to click and for her to realize that what and who I am is disturbing. That everything about me is vaguely wrong but disguised. “No one can know. Ever.”
Simone rubs my arm with her free hand and pulls me closer to her. She tucks my hair behind my ear, fussing over me with her tender gaze. “You know we all have to hide out, right? That’s why we’re here on Risda.”
“But mine is different. Mine is a death sentence.”
She tugs me against her, resting my head on her shoulder. I lean onto her, my position a little awkward, but my nose is tucked against her neck, and she strokes my arm, and I could stay here forever. “It’s a death sentence for all of us, love. You think I’d let someone take me alive? You think I’d let them enslave me again? I’ll kill myself first, and I know I’m not the only one.”
Her words stun me. I hate the thought of her wanting to kill herself, but…I also get it. My short time enslaved was a nightmare. I was so confused, my thoughts muddied, that it didn’t occur to me to fight back or try to escape. I was lucky that I was rescued, that I had my sisters and the crew of the Scarlet Gaze to help me recover. Simone hasn’t had anyone but herself.
Well, she had Dora, too, but Dora’s no longer on the planet. She’s off gallivanting with her two mates.
Simone strokes my arm again. “I wish you’d talked to me about all this. I didn’t know what was going on, only that you never wanted me around. It really hurt.”
“It’s not that I didn’t want you around,” I explain, lifting my head to look into her eyes. “It’s that this secret isn’t just mine. My sisters are affected, too. If anyone knew I was a clone, they’d automatically start looking into them, and I didn’t want to put them in danger.”
“And now?” Her dark eyes are full of questions.
“Now I’ve decided I can’t truly be with you unless you know who and what I am. My sisters assured me that they can take care of themselves, and I figured it’s time I trust that you can take care of yourself, too. That me holding on to my silence might be protecting them in my way, but that not everyone wants to be alone and safe.” I pause, then add, “I don’t want to be alone and safe. I want to be with you. All day, every day.”
She pulls me in close and kisses me. “I love you.”
“I love you, too. I’m so sorry I scared you.”
“It’s all right. You had your reasons.” She cups my face and gives me a tender smile. “And that’s one mystery answered. Who the hell names their three kids Ruth, Ruthie, and Ruth-Ann after all?”
I giggle. More tears spill out of me, along with hysterical laughter. I collapse against her as she chuckles, just hugging and crying like a baby. A moment later, I feel a wet, raspy tongue on my pant leg. Pluto is trying to comfort me, too.
They’re my family, just as much as Ruthie and Ruth are. I hug Simone tight, pressing my face against her neck. “Did I mention I love you?”
“Feel free to mention it as often as you like.” She kisses my ear.
“I love you. I’m sorry I’m a lousy partner.”