Total pages in book: 36
Estimated words: 33298 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 166(@200wpm)___ 133(@250wpm)___ 111(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 33298 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 166(@200wpm)___ 133(@250wpm)___ 111(@300wpm)
“It’s complicated,” I finally murmur. It’s a lie, and we both know it. Complicated is the word people use when they can’t face the truth.
Fortunately, Blade doesn’t press me about it. He probably just thinks I’m some ditzy romance writer anyway. I don’t know why that thought hurts, but it does.
“Do you have a girlfriend or wife?” I ask as I follow him into his cabin. Maybe it would be better if he did. Then my brain could get back to focusing on Landon. I’m not even sure what it is about Blade. Maybe it’s just because he’s a puzzle and the writer in me needs to understand what makes him tick.
I don’t know what I was expecting inside his cabin, but it wasn’t this. The hardwood floors are covered in oval rugs in cheerful colors and the furniture has quilts strewn over it. The place looks cozy and inviting, and more than that, it feels like home. I breathe in deep, trying to memorize the smell of pine and his cologne.
Blade grunts his response.
“I’ll take that as a no then.” It makes me happy to know that Blade is single. I’m usually the one that’s excited to hear when people are happily coupled. But I don’t want to know that the sexy mountain man is with anyone else.
Inside, he sets the kitty carrier down again and reaches for the latch. “Do you have food?”
“Of course.” I scowl at him. What kind of pet mom does he think I am? I might have skipped lunch, but my boy got a healthy meal. “And he’s trained, sort of. Alvin can be…well, he gets into trouble sometimes.”
“You named your cat Alvin?” He asks as my gray fluffball scrambles out of the carrier.
“Yes,” I explain as Alvin rubs himself against my legs. I lean down to scratch behind his ears. “He’s getting a brother. As soon as the shelter says he’s healthy enough, I’m bringing Simon home. They’ve already bonded.”
Having a companion might help Alvin mellow some, but I doubt it. Not that I would change my kitty. Alvin is perfect just the way he is. Accepting your baby is what being a pet parent is all about. That’s what being any type of parent is about.
I straighten and glance around the cabin that holds no photos, although there is a cool-looking gargoyle made of metal on his side table. I step forward and run my fingers along the intricate artwork, unable to resist touching it. “Do you have any family living nearby?”
Something flashes across his features, a hardness creeping over them. “No family.”
“Anywhere?” I prompt. Sure, I can’t call my parents if I need them. I’d never tell them if I was short on rent money, and I definitely can’t tell them about the trouble with my car. But still, I have the knowledge of where I come from and who I am. Does Blade not have that too?
He turns and strides from the room toward the kitchen. His big boots clomp along the floor as he goes. For a second, I wonder if he’s mad at me.
I hurry after him on my short legs and reach for the back of his t-shirt when he stops in front of the fridge. I don’t know why I want to touch him, but the moment I realize what I’m trying to do, I drop my hand so I can’t make contact. “Sorry. I ask too many questions. I always have. I’m curious about the world around me. Maybe, that’s why—”
He spins around so fast that I stop talking and glares at me. His nostrils flare, and there’s fire in his gaze. “Don’t you ever apologize for being yourself. Not to me. Not to anyone.”
I swallow, the sound loud in the small space. Other than Zoey, I’ve never had someone that didn’t want me to apologize. That didn’t ask me to somehow make myself less. Less loud. Less vibrant. Less big.
We live in a world that celebrates women that make themselves small—the selfless ones that give and give and give while never taking for themselves. The ones that lose weight then more weight then more again. Until they’re only shadows of who they want to be.
I barely know Blade, and he doesn’t mind if I take up space or ask questions or follow him around his cabin. My eyes tear up at his unexpected words, and the way they soothe an ache in me that I didn’t even realize was there.
He cups my face in his roughened hand. His thumb sweeps across my cheek gathering up the lone tear. “You deserve better than all the ones that said you had to change.”
I manage what I hope is a smile. How is it that this man can see straight into my soul? How can he lay me bare with just one look?