Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 92899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 372(@250wpm)___ 310(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 372(@250wpm)___ 310(@300wpm)
He could be closer to me.
“So what’s the problem?” Mom asked. “I still don’t get why you’re so convinced it won’t work.”
“Tommy’s spent his whole life being a good guy, doing what’s right. Trying to be perfect. He’s selfless and kind, generous and devoted. There’s no way he’s going to give up a chance to move back home to be near his parents and grandparents. And he’s not going to reject the opportunity of a lifetime if Stanford decides to give him an offer. Guys like him… they don’t say no to Stanford, Mom.”
Even if it might not make them happy.
“He sounds like a nice man,” she said carefully.
My throat was too thick to speak, so I nodded into the dark cab of the truck and made a mmhm sound.
“Are you going to be okay, sweetheart?”
I shook my head, glad she couldn’t see me. “When am I ever not?” I asked, forcing a smile on my face in hopes she’d hear it.
“Wouldn’t hurt you to be a little selfish, you know. You don’t always have to be so strong.” She paused again, and just when I expected her to press, she changed the subject. “Tell me you heard about Hanson arresting the guy towing a hot tub?”
I was grateful for the opportunity to collect myself. “What? No. Why’d he bring him in? Must have been a good reason, but towing a hot tub itself isn’t illegal.”
“There were people in it at the time,” she said with a snicker. “And apparently, they’d been enjoying their party the whole way from Mammoth Hot Springs.”
I let the sound of her laughter and the remainder of her story carry me the rest of the way back to SERA, and for fifteen straight minutes, I wasn’t bombarded by thoughts of the golden boy who’d weaseled his way under my skin in such a short time.
But when I opened the door to the cabin and heard Chickie’s pitiful whine of disappointment, something felt different. Not just Tommy’s absence—I’d been expecting that. It was the way his things were still here, scattered around like he belonged. His book on the nightstand. His jacket on the chair. The lingering scent of that damn shampoo.
For the first time since Hawaii, I let myself imagine what it would feel like if he never came back. If Stanford offered him everything he’d ever dreamed of and he took it. If he left me behind.
The thought hit me like a physical blow. To never share a room with him again, a shower. A bed.
To never sit next to him and share a laugh over a training exercise gone wrong, or strategize a rescue drill, or have him remind me to give a student a fair shake because people could change.
To never run my tongue along the ticklish spot below his ribs and hear the intake of breath half a beat before his soft snort of laughter.
“Fuck,” I whispered to the empty room. Suddenly, it was clear to me that if he came back to me, even if only for a few more weeks, I’d take every ounce of him I could.
If he’d give me another chance, I’d grab any opportunity to have a summer fling with Tommy Marian, even knowing it would leave mangled wreckage behind after he was gone.
Better to taste heaven for a few weeks than spend the rest of my life wondering what loving Tommy Marian felt like.
18
TOMMY
My hands shook as I opened the door to Cabin 8. It had been a long two days, and I was dead on my feet. My uncle Jude had insisted on sending me to San Jose in his plane, which meant I’d managed to catch a little bit of sleep on the way there and on the way back.
By the time I’d reached Hazel and Avery’s place a couple of hours ago, I’d nearly burst into tears. Hazel was awake and cranky, complaining about all the fuss the family was making over her recovery. Thankfully, she’d allowed me a few minutes to talk about the details of her medical situation and assure me she was following her discharge instructions.
Unthankfully, my mother had taken one look at me and insisted I either crawl into the nearest guest bed or make my way back to SERA in their rental car asap to get some real sleep. While I knew she was right, I bristled at being babied while I was trying to assert my authority as a physician with real concerns over Hazel’s recovery.
But now that I was here, only moments away from seeing Foster, suddenly, I did want to be babied. I wanted someone—okay, fine, a specific someone—to take care of me. And if he wanted to brush my teeth and tuck me into bed, all the better.
As soon as the door opened, Chickie barreled into my legs, knocking me back until I nearly tripped down the single step to the dirt path beyond.