Total pages in book: 126
Estimated words: 116231 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 387(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 116231 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 387(@300wpm)
“We should make a list of what you are looking for,” Ariella states, “and then put it out into the universe.”
“Ohhh, that sounds like fun,” Lexi says. “Okay, so how tall?”
I lean back in the chair and my mind immediately goes to Knox, and for the life of me, I have no idea why. He’s the complete opposite of what I would normally go for. “Over six feet. Lean, brown eyes, and dark hair.” Which is nothing like the blond-haired, blue-eyed devil that Knox is. “Also, no kids. Not that I don’t like kids, but no one has time for a baby momma who is going to make your life hell.”
“You know who you should date?” Zoey remarks. “One of Kirby’s friends.”
“That’s not ever going to happen,” Lexi says. “I can say he has made sure that everyone knows you are off-limits.” I look at her, shocked.
“Everyone…” I shake my head. “Well, there goes my big dream of being a WAG,” I joke and pick up my drink. “Well then, I guess it’s all on Nash’s shoulders.” I look at Zoey. “Time for him to step up to the plate and bring me home a finance bro.” Even saying the words, I cringe. “Honestly, guys, I’m just not there. Before I find someone, I need to figure out my own shit.”
“You have to be the most put together person I know,” Ariella says.
I smile at her, then look at Lexi, knowing she knows my story, and that it’s all an illusion. I mean, I have come to terms with it, but I also know love comes with strings, or the love I’m used to comes with strings, and I don’t want that.
I’ve had strings my whole life, a puppet master making sure I did what I was told; did things to please him. “It’s not as cut and dry as that,” I tell them, “but when I do start dipping my toe in the dating pool, you guys will be the first ones to know. Until then, I shall enjoy the single hookups here and there.” I take a sip. “That’s the safest thing for me right now.” I take a deep inhale. “Now, the real question is, who is going to be driving us home?” I change the subject, at the same time trying not to feel sad that I’m going to be going home alone.
seven
Knox
I walk out of the locker room with my gloves in my hands and put one under my arm as I grab my stick and head to the ice. The sound of the pucks hitting the boards echoes as I walk out of the tunnel toward the bench and out the wood door that swings open. Gliding onto the ice, I put my glove on and then move the stick to my gloved hand before tying the strap under my helmet. “Look who decided to show up,” Kirby ribs me, his hip cocked to the side, both his hands on his stick as he waits for Coach to give us the drill.
“I was here before you were,” I tell him. “I was on the bike for an hour before you rolled out of bed.”
“Fuck that,” he retorts, “you were not.”
“I was.” I nod at him as Jaxon comes over to our huddle.
“Who was what?” he asks, adjusting his helmet.
“I was here at eight this morning,” I tell the guys, and Jaxon just stares at me. “Had breakfast and then hit the bike.”
“This morning?” he asks me, pointing to the ice.
“No, five weeks ago.” I roll my eyes. “Yes, this morning.”
“Why the fuck were you here so early?” he asks, and I shrug my shoulders.
“I don’t know, I hate when the kids aren’t there; the house is deafening with the silence. It’s almost as if the walls are screaming, ‘you lonely fuck’ at me.” They both laugh. “I think I’m going to get a dog.”
“What?” Jaxon says. “Do you know the commitment you need with a dog?”
“Get a cat,” Kirby suggests.
“Cats are so boring,” Jaxon says.
“Yeah.” Kirby smirks. “But you don’t have to toilet train a cat,” he points out, and I think about it. “Best thing is you don’t have to worry about them, totally independent.”
“But I want the company,” I tell them.
“What are you going to do when you go away?”
“They have doggy daycare and shit,” I fire back. “The kids would love it and—”
“It’s just a huge commitment,” Jaxon says. “Like the puppy stage. Pissing all over the house.” He rolls his eyes. “We had a dog when we were growing up. Crate training was the worst time of my life. Dog stayed up all night whining, like all fucking night.” He shakes his head. “My father even came out of his room and yelled shut up.” He looks at me. “My sister had to sleep in a sleeping bag beside the crate to calm him down.”