Total pages in book: 203
Estimated words: 199654 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 998(@200wpm)___ 799(@250wpm)___ 666(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 199654 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 998(@200wpm)___ 799(@250wpm)___ 666(@300wpm)
And Joel hasn’t hooked up with anyone in over a decade. Talk about a dry spell…
So yeah, these past few months, I’ve been making a point of trying to make things clear to Grey’s sister instead of continuing to ignore her crush. Because especially since Ty got back, she was making it far too obvious, blatantly making it clear she knew it’d be happening for me soon and that she wanted it to be her. I didn’t have a clue who it’d be; just knew it was close at hand. After watching Joel and even Linc I didn’t want to have to let anyone down easy, especially not someone I have to see pretty much daily.
Linc was twisted up over having to put the brakes on with Cicely. He told me a few weeks ago that if he didn’t know he had a fated mate out there, he would’ve been completely happy to make it official with her. But since he knew different, he had to pull back. He said she was pulling back too, that they both knew the score, that it was all unsaid but understood. And evidently it was the right call. Because Cicely belongs to Jared Stone and Linc and Jared are tight. I don’t know how that played out or how Jared feels about the fact Linc’s gone there with Sis, but now that I know it’s Bailey for me, this means Linc now steps up to the plate. The first five of us have identified our mates one after the other pretty quickly, falling like dominos, so at least it shouldn’t be long before it’s all done for all seven and life can move the fuck on.
So, Bailey is pissed at me for being an asshole today. And for being an asshole at the pack party for Erica. Was I pissed off when Danica got that text from the birthday girl asking her to not get physical with me for the sake of Bailey’s feelings? Fuck, yeah, I was pissed at being cockblocked. Who wouldn’t be? And yes, I also needed Bailey to catch a hint. I knew it stung. And now I’ll have to make it up to her. Help her understand where my head’s been at. I’ve been stressed over my impending mating, and now that it’s here this drama right now means I can’t do what I’m built to do.
One of the downsides to keeping things casual with women for all these years is that I don’t get deep, don’t get emotional with them. All that’s got to change. Because now I know it’s Bailey and I sure as shit know her well enough to know she’s gonna want to get deep. She’s the type who wants to pick things apart and understand them. She’ll expect to do that with me. And I’m not looking forward to it, don’t really know how, but know it’s how it’ll have to be. I’ll learn.
She fetches and arranges the blanket so she can lay on the half spread out on the cement floor and pull the rest around herself, putting her head on the pillow. I grind my teeth at the notion of her lying on this cold floor, hating that I can’t hold her and keep her warm.
Sensations swim through my veins. Craving. Need.
I want to keep her warm. Feel her. Lose myself in that sweet aroma. My fingers tingle, wanting to touch her and it’s beyond frustrating to have her this close to me, smelling like this, looking so soft, being so out of reach.
Waking up restrained and having her also restrained and out of reach, flopped over being unconscious… it did some damage to me as I processed the knowledge that my fated mate has been under my nose all this time. That I didn’t know who had us or what they planned to do. I’m worried I’ll keep seeing that image in my nightmares. Feeling her close right now would help, I think. And I’m pissed at her for putting me in this transparent cage because it means I can’t.
After a while, Bailey’s breathing evens out and the sound settles something inside me. I’d been feeling like I’m not ready to worry about a mate. But watching her, listening to her breathe close to me, I know it’s how it should be. I should be taking care of her, basking in her attention and letting it feel good to let her love me the way she’s wanted to do for all these years.
I have no clue what it’ll feel like to let her in, but I’m eager to explore all that and find out.
***
Though those fuckers shut the lights out and have this window boarded up, I suspect it’s the middle of the night. She’s been asleep a few hours and there’s been no noise and no active scents above us, so I lean back and close my eyes, resisting the urge to fantasize about seeing her nude.