Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 94279 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 471(@200wpm)___ 377(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94279 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 471(@200wpm)___ 377(@250wpm)___ 314(@300wpm)
I grabbed a glass and poured seltzer from the tap. Will chugged half of it down, then bent with hands on his knees and took a few deep breaths.
“Are you okay?”
“No. You just fucking told me you’re pregnant. Of course I’m not okay. You’re my little sister.”
“I’m twenty-six, not twelve.”
“You’re not married.”
“Thanks for pointing that out. I wasn’t aware. Come to think of it, I also didn’t realize it was 1952 and you had to be married to be pregnant.”
“You know what I mean…” Will kept shaking his head. But he seemed to be able to breathe, so I walked back around to the other side of the bar.
“Whose head am I busting open? Wilder’s, I assume?”
I frowned. “There will be no busting anything. But yes, Wilder is the father. I came to you because I need someone to talk to, Will. Do you think you can put all your dumb masculinity and archaic opinions aside for a few minutes?”
My brother was quiet as he stared down at the bar. He took a deep breath before looking up. “Are you happy?”
“I was pretty shocked when I found out, but I’m warming up to happy. I always wanted a family. I just didn’t expect it so soon.”
Will shook his head. “Doesn’t matter if you plan it. You’re never ready for it. It’s like a punch; you take it as it comes.”
“Poetic.”
“Not that I give a shit, but it affects you—how did Wilder take the news?”
I knew my brothers. If I told them the full truth—that he’d walked out on me after I told him and had sent me only a few one-sentence texts in the last two weeks—they’d hold a grudge against him forever. I wasn’t sure how Wilder was going to be in my life, but we were going to have a baby together, so it probably wasn’t smart to turn the entire family against him.
“He was even more shocked than I was.”
Will’s jaw flexed. “So he’s not going to be a father to this kid?”
“He’ll be involved in some way. We’re … still figuring it out.”
“Sending a check isn’t being a parent.”
“I know.”
“Raising a kid alone isn’t easy.”
“I know that, too. I’ve watched you do it. But Olivia turned out great.”
Will let out a big sigh. “You won’t be doing it alone. I got your back. You’ve always had mine. And Olivia’s.”
The choice to speak to Will, of all people, seemed a little insane. He was the toughest critic of the family. Yet I’d wanted to tell him first. Now I realized why. I’d needed to hear those words. “I got your back.”
I fought tears. “I’m scared, Will.”
He smiled half-heartedly. “Welcome to parenthood. What you’re feeling right now? It never goes away. The things you’re scared about just change. You go from being terrified about whether you’re ready to have a baby, to being terrified about whether you’re holding the kid’s head right. Eventually you settle in and think, maybe I got this. Then the terrible twos start, and don’t even get me going on the shit I worry about with a fourteen-year-old girl.”
“Anne would be proud of how you’ve raised Olivia.”
“She’d be proud of how you stepped up, too. I’m not sure who would’ve been more traumatized if I’d had to have that period conversation with her six months ago, me or Olivia.”
“Considering you came home with a bag of incontinence products instead of period stuff, I’m pretty sure it would’ve been her.”
Will chuckled. “How the hell was I supposed to know?”
I picked up my slice of pizza and bit into it again. My appetite had been nonexistent lately, but suddenly I was starving.
“Does Dad know yet?” Will asked.
I shook my head and finished chewing. “You’re the only person who knows besides Wilder. I’d appreciate it if you kept it to yourself until I’m ready to tell everyone else.”
“Of course. It’s your business. Are you waiting until the end of the first trimester to tell people?”
I’d been waiting to have a real conversation with Wilder. His occasional text asking how I felt left me in limbo. I’d hoped to have a more concrete plan on how Wilder and I were going to handle things before talking to Dad, but the last few days I’d lost faith that was going to happen anytime in the near future.
“No, I’m going to tell him soon.”
Will nodded. A few minutes later, a couple of early customers wandered in, effectively bringing our conversation to an end. It was just as well, since I didn’t have much more to say. After I finished two slices, I stuck around for another half hour, helping stock behind the bar and getting things ready for the weekend crowd.
Will walked over as I put my jacket on. “You getting out of here?”
“I have a bunch of errands to run. I’ll stop back and do the books tomorrow.”