Total pages in book: 126
Estimated words: 123065 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 615(@200wpm)___ 492(@250wpm)___ 410(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123065 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 615(@200wpm)___ 492(@250wpm)___ 410(@300wpm)
I always do. Isn’t that my purpose? To see each and every single possible reality only to be tortured in the end because it’s always the same for them, always. They have so much potential, but it gets jerked away the minute they step foot in front of me. She was going to meet someone next month at her favorite coffee shop. A police officer. My smile’s bitter as the scene unfolds to them kissing, him proposing. She decides on a destination wedding, how poetic. Anger wars with annoyance, but I can’t keep looking, searching, wondering what the point of it all is, when I know damn well what the point of my existence, and my reality is. She’s living a lie. After her wedding, she has one child, and they spend a normal existence through the years as one big happy family, only to have her husband die in a car wreck with her daughter after coming home from her choir concert, leaving Cleo once again…
Alone.
Without anyone.
Miserable
Isolated.
The future is the only thing that justifies the present for me. Who would want to live like that? Some might say that they would rather love for however much time they’ve been given, but that’s complete bullshit, I’ve seen it my entire existence.
And one thing always rings true.
All humans lie.
They’re thankless, unreliable, and yet we need them as much as they need us. What a twisted, screwed up fate.
I pull my hand away.
Bast meows at me.
I roll my eyes. “I was just looking.”
He meows again.
“It’s not against the rules.” Specks of starlight flicker on her skin where I touched her; they disappear almost instantly, soaking into her skin. She’ll never know. Cleo flips over to her side, her hand falls next to my body. The bracelet she refuses to take off is dangling from her wrist. I don’t dare touch it. It’s half of the sun. I wonder if she truly knows what it means to wear that on her wrist. Even if she did a deep search, she would never figure it out. What a damning future.
Bast growls louder, but the sun calls to me. I reach for the small half charm and press a finger against it.
My eyes squeeze shut, and I allow it, what I’ve never allowed. Hope. Dreams. Things I’ve given everyone but myself.
It feels so damn good I’m at a loss of breath, words.
“Push!” I grip her hand. “You’re doing so well, Cleo. I’m so proud of you!”
“This is all your fault!” she screams at me, then starts to sob when she hears the baby’s first cry.
But when I look over at my son, I stumble back. His eyes are black, his skin a greenish blue color, like that of the sea, of the beginning.
Of the end.
I draw a deep fortifying breath and calm myself.
See what hope brings you? Dreams.
Destruction.
It was a nice thought, and for a while, everything was at peace in a lifetime of war.
Cleo stirs next to me. I sit up and get to my feet. Her hand reaches out to grab mine. “I just had the strangest dream. I never even wanted kids.”
“Dreams…” I pull the blankets up to her face. Her eyes aren’t even open, she’s just mumbling in her sleep. “…Are always one part reality and one part future. Sometimes it’s best to crush them before they happen.”
“That’s sad.” She yawns and grabs the pillow, clutching it to her side.
My chest aches. She looks so innocent. So free. So lonely. I want to lay next to her and whisper lies into her ears. “Everything’s going to be fine. I’ll take care of you. Just rest. I’ve got you.”
The biggest tragedy of all is that I can’t even bring myself to do it, better she walk into this with her eyes wide open like everyone else.
I press a soft kiss to her forehead. “I’m sorry. If it’s any consolation, I’m so sorry.”
Bast meows then rests his head against hers in comfort.
I nod in understanding. “Take care of her as long as you can.”
Bast meows again.
I start to walk out of the room, then turn and say, “kill if necessary.”
Bast growls deep in his throat.
“Good. Boy.”
CHAPTER 12
CLEO
“Those you trust will disappoint you a dozen times, it’s up to you to choose forgiveness when they do. After all, they’re only human.” –Ethan, Immortal Vampire of The Dark Ones Council
After dreaming of meeting some random cop back in New York, I dreamed of giving birth to Cyrus’s child, which is strange even for me. I rarely dream, and when I do, they’re usually images or shapes, not actual futures that feel so real you could swear you felt the pain of actual labor. When I close my eyes again, I dream of swords. Of the sound of them clanging against each other. Metal on metal, the heaviness of the crown of whoever bears them.