Total pages in book: 120
Estimated words: 114211 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114211 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
“Oh, how darling,” sings Bethie, “a teacher. Hmm, he must be a young teacher, looking at you.”
“Twenty-five,” I confirm, “two years younger.”
“Mmm, darling,” she repeats with a happy smile.
Pete wags his butter knife between us. “We didn’t even know we grew up in neighboring towns ‘til we met in the Army. Kansas boys, both of us, less than an hour’s drive apart.”
“Kansas,” mutters Anthony to himself.
I glance his way.
Cody shifts in his seat. “Well, if you two want to extend your stay, you’re more than welcome to, as long as you want. And if you wanna stay even longer than that, just say the word, we’ll clear out the office, turn it back into a guestroom, get a bed, you name it. Not gonna make you sleep on that couch for a month,” he adds with a nod at me, “whether it’s like sleeping on a cloud or not.”
“Kansas,” mumbles Anthony again.
“I wanna make a toast,” says Pete, lifting his glass. “To good friends, good family, good times with them all, and finding home wherever your heart leads you.”
“Oh, he’s a poet,” murmurs Juniper with wonder, before the rest of the table clink their glasses, echoing his sentiments.
Anthony, too, though a bit distractedly.
It isn’t until after the table’s cleared and the others are lost in a chat about something funny that happened at the church this morning that I catch Anthony by the back door. “You alright?”
He’s staring vaguely through the glass. “Yeah.”
“Your head is someplace.”
“Was … just thinkin’ how happy I felt this weekend is all.”
I nod slowly, waiting for the rest. “That sounds like … a good thing to be thinking. Isn’t it?”
“You guys are going back home in a week? To … Kansas?”
“Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t think it’s decided yet.”
“What about your mom?” he asks, turning to me. “And your younger brother? Don’t they miss you?”
Juniper and Bethie cackle at something in the kitchen, and Pete shouts out in protest, red-faced and laughing too, while Trey and Cody shake their heads. I have no idea what it’s about.
“Are you afraid of me leaving?” I ask, getting to the point.
Anthony crosses his arms. “Nah. I knew it was comin’. I knew you’re just here for now. Whatever’s goin’ on between us, it’s just a … just a for-now kinda thing. I get it.”
“Anthony …”
“I’m gonna need you to fuck me every night, though,” he says as he stares out the window. “And hold me as tightly as you did last night when we fell asleep afterwards.”
I nearly laugh. “So that’s all I am to you, huh?” I tease him. “Just a guy to—” It feels wrong using this language in this house with two reverends nearby, but I bring my voice down and do it anyway. “—to fuck you hard while I’m here?”
“And hold me tight.”
I put my arms around him suddenly, surprising him. “I know I’m a lot more than that to you. Why else would I have made you so angry all week? That’s what’s really been going on. You’ve been mad I didn’t kiss you the second we met at that gas station. Or confessed how cute you looked at church last Sunday, even if you were struggling to stay awake. Or how damned adorable you look in an apron, taking our orders at Gran’s Kitchen …”
“Shut up,” he mumbles—even as he melts into my embrace.
“And,” I go on, “I can hold you tightly no matter if we’re in bed falling asleep or standing right here by a door staring outside at nothing. I can hold you anywhere, anytime.”
Anthony peers over at the others, seems to realize they either don’t notice or don’t care what’s going on over here by the door, then turns back to the window. “I’m not starin’ at nothing.”
“What’re you staring at then?”
“Jefferson.”
I frown, looking outside. There’s nothing in the yard.
“My dog. He was the sweetest creature on this planet. I miss him so much.” He sighs. “Can see him runnin’ around in that yard out there, havin’ the time of his life. Barely been a year since he’s been gone, feels like yesterday he was here, barkin’ and bein’ a menace. I loved him so much. I think his death messed me up way more than I’ve ever admitted to myself. All this time without him. Time really just … flies on by. Fuckin’ time.”
My hold on him tightens. “Is that what you’re afraid of? Time? How fast it flies?”
“Afraid? No. I ain’t afraid of anything.”
“Really? Impressive.”
The teasing sarcasm is either ignored or goes over his head. “I was just wonderin’ if we could’ve known each other all this time … had I not injured myself in boot camp like a moron and actually made it into the Army.” He looks up at the sky, as if imagining it in detail. “What if we ended up in the same place? Could’ve been the three of us out there … you, me, Pete … maybe whatever it is that’s goin’ on right now between us, could’ve started years ago.”