Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 119548 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119548 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
“Right. Nana.” She nibbled on her thumbnail before Fred gently pushed her hand away from her mouth. “Did you really have to propose, though? Can’t you just… fake date? Call me old-fashioned, but getting married just because Nana wants someone to look after this moron seems like a ridiculous idea.”
I resented being called a moron.
Besides, I wasn’t the moron who suggested it in the first place.
“For what it’s worth, I happen to agree,” I said, cocking my hip and leaning against the bar. “Granny also told us that if we get married, an annulment or divorce isn’t allowed, and I really don’t want to be responsible for this one for the rest of my life.”
Fred cleared his throat. “You’ve been responsible for me for twenty-nine years. What’s another fifty?”
“A bit of a nightmare, if I’m honest.”
Lucy laughed. “You already argue like an old married couple. And you used to take baths together, so you’ve already seen each other naked.”
“We were children!” I snapped. “Didn’t you just say that us getting married is a ridiculous idea?”
“No. I actually think you two should get married. I am a card-carrying member of the FreDeli ship. Or I would be if we had cards.”
I blinked at her. “The fucking what now?”
“The FreDeli ship. You know, both your names together?”
“I wish that was something I didn’t know.”
“Amen,” Fred muttered. “I can never unhear that.”
My sister waved her hand. “Nana started it back when you were teens and went to prom together. She’s the captain of the ship.”
I was starting to think her last wish was less me getting married and more me getting married specifically to Fred.
“Okay, well, it was nice talking to you both, but I don’t think I ever want to do this again,” I said, pushing off the bar.
“You’ll have to. At your wedding.” Lucy grinned.
“Whose wedding?” Si asked, stepping up next to me and resting his elbow on my shoulder.
“Oh,” I said flatly. “Have you finished your very important paperwork, boss?”
“Just taking a break. All that typing makes my fingers stiff.” He wiggled his fingers in front of my face. “Whose wedding are we talking about?”
Lucy’s eyes flickered to me, but before I could threaten her with revealing her true cravings to our mother, she quickly said, “Deli and Fred’s.”
Si cocked his head down at me. “It’s about time, isn’t it?”
“Thank you.” Fred raised his hand in triumph. “That’s another point for me.”
“We’re not keeping score, numbnuts,” I quipped. “Besides, your grandmother and Si aren’t exactly a large survey pool.”
“Shall I pop one on the door and see what everyone thinks, then?”
Si turned to him. “What are you keeping score about?”
Didn’t I just say that we weren’t?
Did anyone listen to me around here?
Don’t answer that, Delilah.
“Whether or not anyone would be surprised if we suddenly announced we’re getting married,” Fred answered. “I don’t think anyone would be, but she does. I’m already two up.”
“Three.” Lucy held up her hand, sipping on her drink.
“Traitor,” I muttered, shrugging Si’s elbow off my shoulder.
He tugged on my ponytail. “Don’t be so grumpy, Deli. You know it’s true. Not a single resident of Hartford Green would be shocked if you two sent out a round of wedding invitations in the next five minutes.”
Look.
It wasn’t like I didn’t know that. Not only was Fred the most eligible bachelor in the area, but he was genuinely the nicest guy, too. More than that, he was handsome, thoughtful, motivated, kind, and rich.
He was perfect husband material.
But he was my best friend. I’d never seen him as a man—not like that. Sure, we’d been each other’s first kiss, but that was when we were awkward preteens and didn’t know anything about it and practiced with each other.
That was a long time ago. Since those misguided days of learning how not to suck someone’s face off, we’d never repeated anything like that. We’d never wanted to.
He was just… Fred.
And I was just Delilah.
No matter what anyone insisted, there was nothing remotely romantic or sexual between us. There never had been, and I genuinely could not foresee a time in the future where such feelings would ever arise in either of us.
So how could we possibly get married?
“All right, that’s enough,” Fred said. “Stop teasing her, or she won’t speak to any of us for a week.”
I narrowed my eyes at him, and he smiled lopsidedly, his eyes twinkling with a softness I knew was reserved for me.
“Don’t threaten us with a good time,” Si joked.
I punched him in the arm. “You’re on cleanup duty tonight for that,” I said as I walked off.
“Hey, aren’t I your boss?”
“So legend says,” I retorted. “You’re still mopping the floors, though.”
6
* * *
DELILAH
Imanaged to successfully avoid Nana’s questions about my secret lover for three days, but I was shit out of luck today.
It was my day off.