Total pages in book: 168
Estimated words: 169013 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 845(@200wpm)___ 676(@250wpm)___ 563(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 169013 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 845(@200wpm)___ 676(@250wpm)___ 563(@300wpm)
Chuckling, she ran her fingers through his hair. “Just because I always want you to remember. No matter what.”
She knelt in front of him and set her hand on his chest. “Because we have to remember to always love with everything we have, even when it scares us.”
“I will,” he promised.
Her smile was soft. “It’s your heart.”
Silas noticed that her attention darted to the big clock over the fireplace again. She’d done it the whole night when she didn’t think he was watching, the hours ticking by and his dad’s plate still sitting on the table.
He’d been home a lot lately, and it was better when he was because then his momma didn’t seem so upset, and the worst thing in Silas’s life was when his momma got sad.
He could see that sadness clouding at the very edges of her eyes, making tiny wrinkles, even though she forced it back.
“All right, you two. It’s time for bed.”
“I not tired.” Elena always said that and then fell asleep in five seconds flat. But Silas really wasn’t tired. He wanted to stay up and keep his momma company so she wasn’t alone.
But when she told him to get up and brush his teeth, he did, helping his little sister, too. Telling her to open wide as she stood on her tippy toes on the stool next to him as he helped her brush her tiny teeth.
She gurgled and giggled and grinned, and he helped her wipe her mouth when they finished, then took her hand and led her to her crib that sat in the corner across from his bed.
Their momma swept Elena up, peppered her face with kisses, then tucked her under her covers.
He’d already crawled into his bed when she turned around, her smile so soft as she looked at him. She knelt at his side, ran her hands through his hair the way she always did, murmured, “My big helper. Thank you.”
“I can do everything you need, Mom.”
“I know you can, but you’re supposed to have fun too.” It sounded like a tease mixed up with something bad.
He almost rolled his eyes. He always had a lot of fun, and he had a ton of Little League games and practices. Besides, his momma always made everything a game, even if it was work.
“You don’t gotta worry, Mom.”
“I always worry about you.”
“How come?”
She played with his bangs. “Because it’s natural to worry about someone when we love them so much.”
He guessed he worried about her, too.
Worried so much when a long time later the front door came banging open.
He could almost hear the shift in the mood.
That sadness he was talking about curling through the air.
So quiet but it still blared in his ears.
He heard his momma’s voice break. “You promised.”
His daddy scoffed. “You gonna start nagging me the second I walk through the door?”
“You’re drunk.”
The voices swam down the hall from the kitchen.
“Well, aren’t you sharp. You want an award?”
“I want a husband who doesn’t tell me lies.”
Mean laughter floated all around.
Silas’s stomach felt sick.
“Guess you picked the wrong guy, then.”
“I guess I did.” His momma sounded like she was giving up on something important.
A loud crack echoed against the walls, and his momma quietly cried out. Silas was on his feet and racing to the end of the hall, halting in the doorway to the kitchen.
His dad stood over his mom, who was on her knees, holding her face, and the sickness in Silas’s stomach crawled up his throat.
His heart pounded so fast. So fast. Like it didn’t know how to stay behind his ribs and was going to bust all the way out. The way it did whenever his dad got home and was mad like this.
“You want to talk to me like that again?”
His dad’s clothes were dirty. His hair sticking up and he smelled disgusting. It made Silas want to throw up.
His momma lifted her face to him. It was streaked with tears.
Something hot and ugly curled inside Silas. Like fiery ropes that twisted through his guts and made him want to do bad things.
His momma slowly rose to her feet, her shoulders sagging but her chin tipped up. “I know you spent that money. I saw the bank account. It’s gone, isn’t it? The deposit and first and last month’s rent for the new house?”
His dad scuffed a garbled sound. “Don’t you worry about that.”
A huff of disappointment shot from her. “Don’t worry about it? Worrying about it is all I do. I’m the only one who worries about anything. About whether the kids have food or a roof over their heads. You clearly don’t care.”
“Always dramatic. Beggin’ for a fight.”
She choked a strangled sound. “So this is my fault?”
“If you weren’t such a greedy bitch, things would be just fine.”
“Just go. Leave the way you always do. But this time, don’t come back. I’ll figure this out on my own.” Her voice was too soft, and he was worried his dad wouldn’t know she meant it.