Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 58150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 291(@200wpm)___ 233(@250wpm)___ 194(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 58150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 291(@200wpm)___ 233(@250wpm)___ 194(@300wpm)
Noah squeezes my shoulder from the back seat. “It’s fine. We can handle it.”
“Do they know what I did for Fern?” I stare out the windshield at a building that’s not supposed to be intimidating but suddenly is.
“They do,” Char says. “I think they have some kind of loophole in their bigotry.”
I nod. “Right. As long as the money keeps coming, they can ignore me and pretend they don’t need me.”
“Can I ask you something?” Char’s voice is small.
“Anything.”
“Why do you still give them money?”
Noah and I have had this exact same conversation, and the truth is, I don’t know anymore. The excuse I’d used the past few years is they had Daisy, Fern, and Wade, and I didn’t want my siblings to suffer or miss out. But now Wade is the only one left, and in three years, he’ll be out of the house too. I don’t know what my move will be then.
They’re my parents. They gave me life. Dad gave me my love of football and spared no expense when I was a kid to make sure I had the right opportunities open to me.
No, he wasn’t a great father. Yes, he caused me to have internalized homophobia for a long time before I dealt with it. And yes, he now treats me and Jet like pariahs. But where’s the line?
When you owe your family everything, how much money does it cost to repay your debt?
Noah found it easy to write off his cold father, but there’s a difference between my dad and his. When faced with the possibility of losing Noah, his father wanted to make the effort to fix their broken relationship. Mine is the one who shut me out.
“Maybe I’ll rethink it once Wade is in college,” I mutter.
Char pats my arm. “If I don’t tell you enough, you’re the best big brother we could’ve asked for, and if the others don’t tell you, we all appreciate you. Even Daisy, who doesn’t actually know how much you’ve done for her by keeping Mom and Dad afloat these past few years.”
I chew my bottom lip. “Dad still gambling?”
Char mirrors my nervous habit. “I don’t … I’m not …”
“You don’t know if he is or not?”
“Oh, I know the answer. I just don’t want to tell you.”
I throw my head back on the headrest of my seat. “That bad?”
“They take your money for granted, and it pisses me the fuck off. I have no doubt in my mind that I’d still be livin’ in a trailer if it weren’t for you, and I’m not going to take advantage of that like they do. There’s a difference between getting a leg up and extortion. Don’t help them, Matt. I’m beggin’ you to step away so they can be the grown-ups they’re supposed to be for once. If they ask for money, say no. Please.”
“And what about Wade?”
“Don’t you get it? They ain’t givin’ Wade any of your money. They’re wastin’ it.”
“What am I supposed to do, then?”
Suddenly, my sister looks sheepish. “You know how we promised not to tell Wade anything until he turned eighteen like the others? Well, I kinda, sorta … after the whole Fern thing where she got to find out earlier than planned, I thought Wade—”
“We did that for a reason. Wade is still a minor. If Mom and Dad don’t want me anywhere near him, they can legally make me stay away.”
“Look, I know this trip is about Fern and her baby, but I’ve been thinking …”
“What?”
“Wade is so smart. He really has the brains to do more than all of us. Who knows where he gets it from, but could you imagine what he could do if he went to one of the top schools in the country? In, say, New York or Chicago?”
It suddenly clicks. “You want me to take Wade.”
She bites her lip again. “Actually, Fern and I both think it’s what would be best for Wade.”
“What does Wade think?”
“We haven’t discussed it with him. We wanted to talk to you first.”
I sigh. “I should’ve fought harder for y’all.”
“Don’t make me slap you,” Char says. “Up until this year, everything has been fine, I swear it. It’s just Wade is something special, you know? Taking him full-time is a big ask, and you have no responsibility toward him, but … we all want what’s best for him. There’s no contest between you and our parents. You can give him the future he deserves.”
“And if he don’t wanna come with me? If he turns out to be like Daisy and rejects my help?”
“Then maybe he ain’t as smart as his IQ suggests.”
Noah’s quiet in the back, which can’t be a good sign. He surely has opinions on this even if he’s always said he’ll go along with whatever I decide because they’re my family.