Total pages in book: 116
Estimated words: 114068 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 570(@200wpm)___ 456(@250wpm)___ 380(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114068 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 570(@200wpm)___ 456(@250wpm)___ 380(@300wpm)
Haines scoffs. “Hello? You can’t leave me hanging like that!”
I put my car in park and kill the engine, keeping the windows rolled down. Snow White’s birds chirp and sing as I let my head fall back on the seat.
“When this first happened, I thought there was no way we’d keep the baby.”
My brother gasps. “But now you’re thinking about keeping it? Him? Her? Sorry, it feels wrong to refer to a baby as ‘it.’”
I laugh. “Agreed. I still can’t wrap my head around the whole thing. But I talked to Mollie, and…I mean, is it crazy to think having a baby with a guy I’m not even dating might end with us making the happy family I’ve always wanted?”
“Aw, Wheeler. You’re getting me choked up. What a beautiful idea. Not crazy. It would be crazy if you wanted to have a baby with a deadbeat. But Duke is…” Haines scoffs again. “Not that.”
I close my eyes, heart thumping. “I haven’t told him what I’m thinking.”
“Somehow I don’t think he’ll react poorly to this development.”
“Seriously? If I say I want to keep the baby, I’ll be upending his life. He’s already said he wants to be involved, which means—”
Another gasp. “He said that?”
“He did.”
“Be still my beating heart. My God, Wheeler. Maybe he wants to keep the baby too.”
My stomach flips at the idea. “Would you…be there? If I had this baby and we, like, needed you?”
“Of course.” No hesitation. No qualifications.
In many ways, Haines bore the brunt of my parents’ divorce. My parents’ relationship got worse and worse—borderline abusive—as the years went on. Preston and I were able to escape the worst of it since we were in college. But Haines was stuck at home, witnessing the awfulness firsthand on his own.
It’s kind of a miracle he didn’t turn out to be a douche like Preston. Instead, he’s an awesome human being brimming with empathy.
Reminds me a lot of Duke, come to think of it.
“Thank you.” My voice trembles. “I’m scared, Haines.”
“I know you are.”
“Can you imagine what Dad’s gonna say?”
“Fuck him. If he wants to react like a lunatic, let him. It’s his loss.”
I nod. “You’re right.”
“I think Mom would be happy. Mostly because you found such a great guy. You know she’s gonna go bananas over Duke, right?”
Laughing, I slide a hand over my mouth. “You’re jumping twenty steps ahead here.”
“Because it’s gonna happen—Mom is gonna meet Duke, and she’s gonna love him. She’s also gonna be thrilled about the baby.”
“You think so?”
“I know so. Mom might be a little leery that y’all’s relationship is so new, but she’ll see right away that Duke is special. And she loves kids, Wheeler. Why do you think she had three of them with a guy as awful as Dad? That’s how bad she wanted to be a mom. She’s going to love the excuse to be busy too. You need help, Mom’s gonna be there.”
I blink, the realization hitting me. Haines is kind of right. I assumed she wouldn’t want to be embroiled in more messiness. I assumed she’d want to enjoy her newfound freedom, not spend her time babysitting my kid.
Why can’t she do both, though? Could I afford the childcare we need? Duke would pitch in, I’m sure, which means we wouldn’t have to rely on Mom to watch the baby full-time. She could enjoy being a grandma.
My chest twists. All things considered, Duke and I are lucky we’re in a decent enough position to consider these things. The childcare piece is huge now that I’m thinking about it. Mollie and Cash are going to hire a nanny. Could we nanny share, I wonder? Or are there options for day care in Hartsville? I know Ella and Junie go to preschool in the mornings.
Duke might know more. If he doesn’t, I’m relatively certain he’d be more than happy to find out.
“We could make some pretty delicious lemonade out of these lemons if we wanted to, huh?” I ask.
“Duke will bring the sugar.”
I burst out laughing. “You’re gross.”
“You want him. Go get your cowboy. Maybe have his baby while you’re at it.”
That’s the thing, though. Just because I may want to have Duke’s baby doesn’t mean we’re going to end up together. But I am warming up to the idea.
I go inside, munch on some crackers, and then grab a shower. Duke didn’t show up until after four yesterday, so I have some time to myself.
The crackers keep my nausea at bay, and I actually feel pretty damn good as I tilt back my head and let the hot water rinse off the day.
Rinse off the dread and guilt that’s plagued me for what feels like weeks now.
In their place rises a sense of effervescent possibility.
Yes, this all could blow up in my face. That’s the most likely scenario.