Total pages in book: 230
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
All thoughts of yelling fled as his whole soul seemed to sink. How had he not seen this? How had months gone by and he hadn’t recognized that his mother might be dying? “Please allow me to talk to my mother. I’ll take care of her.”
Hanin strode out the door, closing it behind him.
“What is it? Is it cancer?” The thought made his heart seize. He moved to her side, dropping to one knee. Grandmother had died of cancer. He’d watched her waste away even as she’d smiled and tried to pretend everything was all right.
The lines around her eyes tightened. “I didn’t mean for you to know.”
She would probably tell him there was nothing to worry about. Pashmi wouldn’t care that he was the king. Pashmi had changed his damn diapers at one point. She was practically a second mother, so he turned to the one person in the room he could intimidate.
He stood and faced the nurse. “What does my mother have? What is this treatment you’re giving her?”
“A blood transfusion, Your Majesty. She was down two pints, a side effect of the chemotherapy for her cancer. She’ll feel better now. She’ll have much more energy.” The nurse looked back at his mother. “She’s very sick, Your Majesty. It’s stage four ovarian cancer. She had a full hysterectomy but the cancer had spread to her colon and the doctors no longer think the chemo is working.”
He felt as though the wind had been knocked out of him. Those words kicked him in the gut and left him gasping for breath.
This was why she’d done what she’d done.
“You’re going to die and you don’t want to leave me alone.”
“Could we have the room, please?” His mother straightened up, her shoulders going back in a regal fashion.
Pashmi led the nurse outside.
He felt sick. How had he missed this?
“It’s not your fault, Kashmir.”
“I would disagree. How long has this been going on?” How long had he been out there partying while his mother was dying? How many women had he gone through while she’d fought for her life, gone through round after round of hell?
“Please, Kash,” his mother implored. “Please sit with me. It’s not as bad as the doctors say.”
He found the edge of the couch, balancing on it. He wouldn’t sit back in case he needed to carry her out. “I’ll have the doctors tell me themselves.”
“Of course. Don’t be angry with them. I asked them to keep things quiet. I didn’t want to make a fuss.”
No fuss over the fact that she was dying. “Tell me how long you’ve known.”
“I was diagnosed six months ago. I told you I was having surgery.”
“You told me it was routine. You then told me they found nothing serious. I didn’t go to the doctors because you told me it was all fine.” And because he hadn’t wanted to believe. He’d been in a bad place, dealing with the fact that he’d come so close and couldn’t replicate the experiments that had gone well before. He’d come up against failure after failure so he’d done what he did now. He’d found a party and become the life of it. For a month.
He’d offered to come home for the surgery but he’d been somewhat relieved when she’d told him not to, when she’d waved off his worry and laughed that she would rather be alone. She’d told him if he came home, the press would come with him.
He should have come home. He should have been sitting at her bedside when she woke up. She’d had no one. Her husband and eldest son were dead. Shray would never have allowed their mother to go through this alone. Shray would have seen.
Why had God taken Shray and left behind the lesser brother?
“Kashmir, listen to me. I know you’re angry.”
He was angry, but it was muted now. The rage he’d felt was buried under an avalanche of pure guilt. And pain. “You have no idea.”
She sat back, looking older than he remembered. “Yes, I do, and I don’t blame you. I hoped I could get better, but it looks as though I will not.”
“I’ll call in all the doctors.” He would take her anywhere he needed to take her. He would find the best specialist and bring him or her in. “There are new therapies coming out every day.”
“I don’t want them. I’m tired, son. I’ve fought my battle and it’s time to be with your father and your brother.”
All he heard was it was time to leave him alone.
“Please forgive me. I didn’t want to disrupt your life,” she said quietly.
Nope. He couldn’t sit at all. “Not disrupt my life? You don’t allow me to take care of you because you don’t wish to disrupt my life, but you come up with this insane plan to force me to marry?”