Total pages in book: 331
Estimated words: 315585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1578(@200wpm)___ 1262(@250wpm)___ 1052(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 315585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1578(@200wpm)___ 1262(@250wpm)___ 1052(@300wpm)
“To know what?”
Running a hand over his head, he says, “What you went through.”
“What I went through?” I repeat with a sour taste in my mouth.
I sit with my back against a cold wall. There’s nothing else for me to do. I jump when I feel hands on my face. I’m shoved forward and start to fight, but then the mouthpiece is gone, and I relax.
Finally. I want to cry but don’t think I have any tears left.
Then the thing around my neck is removed and the hot material over my face is pulled off.
“Hello, dolly.” Evan kneels in front of me.
I say nothing.
“How do you feel?” He runs his thumb over my lips, and I lean into him. “That’s my good dolly.” He drops his hand to my hip, and I whimper. “Would you like something for the pain?”
“N-o,” I manage to get out. I hate the drugs.
“Are you sure?”
I nod and beg. “Please?”
“Please what, Eve?”
“My arms. I want my arms.”
He pulls out a pocketknife and holds the blade to my neck. I arch away, pushing my head into the wall. “Have you learned your lesson?”
“Yes,” I rush out. “Yes. I promise. Please…”
“Lie on your stomach,” he orders, stepping back.
I push myself off the wall and lie down on my stomach, my head to the side, and he starts to cut the tape.
A sob escapes when he sits down next to me and pulls me into his lap. I don’t have the use of my arms. They just flop to my sides, and I bury my head in his chest.
“Now, now, dolly. I don’t like to hurt you. You know I love you, right?”
I’m sobbing, unable to answer him.
“Shh.” He runs his hand over my sweat-covered hair. “You make me hurt you, Eve. I’m here to help you. You just need to let me.”
I nod my head, soaking his shirt with my tears, snot, and drool. “O-kay,” I hiccup.
I look up at my husband, and he’s just staring at me. Why are things coming back to me? Why am I letting them in? I liked it when I didn’t remember. When that part of my life never existed. It was a nightmare that I woke up from.
Kashton steps forward, and I take one back. His jaw sharpens, and he glances away.
“What I went through,” I repeat again.
“Angel—”
“Want to know what happened after that video ended?” I look to his phone in his hand. “Evan left me in my cell like that for twenty-four hours.” My gaze returns to his, but he can’t look at me. “By the time he removed my hood, I was a sobbing mess. I begged him to help me. Told him that I’d be his best girl.” I swallow the lump in my throat. “He told me he loved me. That he was doing it to help me.”
Kashton drops his head and rubs the back of his neck.
“Is that what you want, Kash? To know how pathetic I was?”
“You were never pathetic,” he growls. “You were trying to survive.”
“Survive?” I snort. “I wanted to die, Kash.”
He glares at me, and I step into him.
“My first week at Dollhouse, a guard came into my cell at night, and I knew what he wanted.” I lick my lips. “What every man I had ever met wanted from me—my body.” I wrap my arms around myself. “When I didn’t willingly give him what he wanted, he took it.”
He runs a hand down his face.
“The next night he came back.” I sniff. “I refused to let it happen again, so I did the only thing I thought would stop him.” My voice cracks.
Kashton reaches out and brushes his tatted knuckles along my tear-streaked cheek. “What did you do, Eve?”
“I pissed and shit myself,” I answer, ashamed, and he tilts his head to the side. “It’s all I could think to do to make myself be unattractive to him. To make him disgusted by me.” My body shakes with anger. “But he didn’t care.” Fresh tears fall from my eyes, and Kashton wipes them away too. I wish he could do the same with my memory. “He rubbed my face in it like a dog. Then he beat me, but not before he got off.” I give a rough laugh. “Because God forbid a man not get to have what he wants. He ended up making me despise myself.”
“Eve—”
I step back from him, and his hand drops to his side. “What else do you want to know, Kash? Want to know about the time they pierced my nose like I was cattle?”
He looks away, and his Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows.
My chest tightens. “You know about that too? How?”
He doesn’t answer.
I slam my hands into his chest. “How many videos have you watched?”
“Five,” he answers, looking back at me.
Five videos? I know about the day I was dropped off at Dollhouse and this one, now my nose piercing. What did the other one show? One was humiliating enough. I give him my back, spinning around.