Series: Cobalt Empire Series by Krista Ritchie
Total pages in book: 234
Estimated words: 226965 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1135(@200wpm)___ 908(@250wpm)___ 757(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 226965 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1135(@200wpm)___ 908(@250wpm)___ 757(@300wpm)
“Can’t…get…” His hoarse voice is too sexy. “…deep enough. Fuck.”
I understand the feeling. I just crave more and more.
Pleasure winds through my core as I glance down and see his erection vanished between my legs, and I suddenly, abruptly, contract on his length. The pressure and fullness and new position soars my orgasm to new levels. It lasts longer than it ever has before, climbing up and coming down three times on repeat, and on the last climax, I feel him jerk upward, his muscles tensing, his fingers tightening in my hair, his cock twitching as he releases inside me. He pumps a little, in and out, milking the sensation—which, wow.
I kind of wish he wasn’t wearing a condom. Maybe one day I’ll feel him drip out of me. One day? Don’t think about it, Harriet. I do not want to ruin the best sex I’ve ever had.
Our bodies slacken together in heavy, tired, sputtering waves. He gently pulls out at the same time he lowers me into the mattress. I’m spent but happy when I see he’s staying on the bed with me. He plants a soft, affectionate kiss on my forehead, then my cheek, then my lips. It’s impossible not to smile a little bit.
He only leaves to dispose of the condom. Once he returns to the pull-out, I’m greedy for his embrace again. We’re lying down together, and I like the way he fits me into his chest and rubs the back of my head tenderly. I think I might like it too much.
A deep ache wells in the pit of my stomach. I anticipated this being hard—having sex knowing he’s going to leave. But I underestimated the pain. It’s an immediate onslaught of emotion. Of feeling ripped open and left to bleed. I try my best to bury it down. He told you. You knew.
My throat tries to close.
I’ve never had sex like this. Emotional, raw sex.
Loving sex.
It makes everything so much more complicated. The flamed wicks of the many candles catch my eye. This was perfect. It was everything a girl like me had stopped hoping for, because I never really thought it was in the cards. Now that it’s here, I can’t believe I might lose it all in weeks.
“Harriet?” Ben props himself on his elbow to stare down at me. He pushes sweaty pieces of my bangs out of my lashes. “You okay?”
Tears squeeze out as I tighten my eyes shut.
He clutches my cheek as I try to turn away. He’s breathing hard like this is agony watching tears slip from the corners of my eyes. “Harriet.”
“I…” I intake a sharp, hiccupping breath.
I think I loved this too much.
I think I love you.
It hits me so suddenly and so hard. I start crying right here. Right now.
“Harriet…” He pulls me into his chest as I quake in full-body sobs. He presses comforting, warm, loving kisses into my hair. He holds me so securely, so possessively, like he’ll never release his clutch, and for a moment, I make-believe that he never will.
44
BEN COBALT
I’d never call having sex with Harriet a mistake. Not for a single second. But it’s impossible not to feel the repercussions of it.
We’re in the shower together, and I can’t believe I’m going to leave this. Her. It throttles me how I might be wrong. Could leaving be worse than staying? It’s a question I don’t have the answer to, which makes me agonize over it even more.
The blue glow from the LED lights basks a calm hue on Harriet. Water drips down her eyelashes, and I rub shampoo into her hair. She lets me—which is a shock in itself. I thought after she stopped crying on the pull-out, she might want to push me away forever.
I can’t discern exactly what has her so upset, but I can make some educated guesses. Still, I’d rather calm her down to where she’s ready to share than badger her for answers when she’s too torn up to. But yeah, Harriet sobbing after I slept with her—not a great feeling.
Is it because I won’t be sticking around? Maybe. Part of me wants to tell her, “I’m on the fence about the future.” But I’m scared to be wishy-washy, even if my head is like a fucking pirate ship on rocky seas.
Fuck, I wish I could figure how to tell her where I might be without compromising the plan. I can’t risk my family finding me if I go through with it. I’m just trying to protect them. If I cause anything else terrible to happen to them…I can’t. I can’t even allow myself to think it.
My panic will escalate, so I breathe out and focus on her.
Harriet.
She’s right in front of me.
Here. Now.
Her back to me, I skate my fingers through her hair, rinsing out some of the shampoo for her. I asked if she wanted to take a shower with me. She could’ve rejected me, curled up in the sheets, cursed me out forever.