Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 73012 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 243(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73012 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 243(@300wpm)
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Donovan asks, his gaze sad, but I don’t think just for him and Hayes. For me as well.
“Because I didn’t know?” My response sounds like a question, and they both look at me with wrinkled foreheads. “Let’s make our plates and sit down.”
A few minutes later, the three of us are at my small table, and once I have my first bite, which is fucking delicious, I admit, “I thought we were just friends.”
Hayes frowns. “I’m confused.”
“I was too! He asked me to dinner, and I thought we were being buddies, ya know? And then we kept doing things together—and in my defense, he didn’t try and hook up with me, so how was I supposed to know we were dating! I mean, who tries to date me and not fuck me? It makes no sense!”
Neither responds right away, both looking at me with kind, sad eyes, making me feel like I’m onstage and everyone is staring at me, waiting to laugh. “What?”
Donovan reaches over, setting his hand on mine. “People can be interested in you for more than sex, Ant.”
I shift uncomfortably. “I know,” I lie.
“Do you?” There’s nothing mocking in his tone, and there’s an honest question there. “I hope you know how great you are. And while sex can be a-fucking-mazing, and I’m sure you’re great at it, it’s possible for Mads to be interested in you for more than sex. Not that there’s anything wrong with hooking up, but there’s nothing wrong either with not doing it.”
“I know.” But how do I tell him that no one has ever wanted me for more than my hole or my mouth? Not even Malcolm. I don’t think he spent nearly as much time with me as he did with Hayes and Donovan, and when we were together, he was often getting his nut and then having to bounce.
“Mads is a good guy. If he’s been dating you, it’s because he likes you,” Donovan insists. “Not just because he wants to sleep with you.”
“We did have sex last night.” I grin. “Really fucking good sex.”
They both grin, and Hayes says, “So you had a boyfriend without benefits and now you have a boyfriend with benefits. Oh my God! You’ll fall in love with Mads and it will be perfect!”
My pulse races, but I try to ignore it. “You’re going a little fast there, buddy. Kason isn’t going to fall in love with me, and we’re not boyfriends.” I don’t think. “We’re dating…and taking it slow.”
“First of all—Kason. He’s Kason now,” Donovan teases.
“Shut up.” I give him the finger.
“It’s cute. But second and more importantly, don’t think I didn’t notice how you said Kason won’t fall in love with you and not that you wouldn’t with him. Remember the things you said to me when I was afraid of ruining things with Eric. I didn’t think he would have feelings for me outside of friendship because I didn’t think I was worth it, and now I’m going to do the same for you. Mads would be lucky to have you. Anyone would be lucky to have you, and the fact that Kason Maddox wants to date you or be boyfriends with you, that’s because you deserve him or anyone else you want.”
I’m not one to get embarrassed easily anymore, but my cheeks do heat. I’ve never had people who talk to me the way Donovan and Hayes do—the way Kason does as well. “I just don’t want to go into this with any expectations…and I don’t want you guys to either. This is just a thing. It’s fun, and Kason and I will enjoy ourselves for a while, and that’s that.”
Hayes reaches over and takes my other hand. “We love you. I would totally be boyfriends with you if I wasn’t in love with Rylan and you weren’t going to marry Mads.”
A laugh jumps from my mouth. God, they’re so great. I’m so lucky to have them. I never expected to have anything like this, and I’ll go through the rest of my life completely grateful if I can at least keep them.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Kason
“I still can’t believe you had a boyfriend who didn’t know you were boyfriends. No offense, bro, but that sounds like something I would do,” Rylan says as we sit beside each other on the flight back to LA.
It’s been a long week away—our bye week getting closer—but we’re on a winning streak now, so I can’t complain. It’s been a whirlwind in other ways too as I’ve fielded questions about my love life and what it means to me to date a member of the Jilted Exes’ Club. The world is filled with so many trash human beings. I don’t get how they go through life lacking empathy for others, but I’ve done my best to avoid answering, while stressing to them that my private life is off-limits. I have no idea if it’s working or why people care so much, but then they only care because of Anthony’s backstory, and that pisses me off.