Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 98000 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 490(@200wpm)___ 392(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98000 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 490(@200wpm)___ 392(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Dean
“Dean…you should eat something. You haven’t had a bite of food all day.” I flinch when Aislin’s hands gently knead my shoulders. She immediately pulls back as if I burned her, but I know she does it for me. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re fine, Ash. I’m fine. Once I hack into his phone, I’ll figure out where he is.” It’s what I’ve been doing since this morning—sitting at the kitchen table with my laptop, leg bouncing, heart racing, hoping like hell I can do this.
“You won’t be able to do much of anything if you’re not taking care of yourself,” she argues.
“I don’t care about me. I fucking care about him. I…love him.”
“I know.” She hugs me from behind. “He loves you too. We’re going to figure this out. Tiernan will be okay. He has to be okay.”
No, he doesn’t, but I don’t say that to her. A lot of people don’t end up okay. My father pissed off Sloan O’Shea, and none of us were ever okay again.
“Anything?” Rory asks, coming into the room. He’s subdued, which has me worried. It means he’s not any more confident than I am.
“No. But I can fucking do this. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Maybe we just start looking for him,” Rory says, “or maybe we call Cil’s dad again. Fuck, for all we know, Sloan doesn’t even have him, and T’s with one of our enemies.”
“We’re not in a war. No one would take Tiernan,” Cillian replies.
“Just because we’re not in a war doesn’t mean we don’t have enemies. You know that as well as I do.”
Their arguing feels like a jackhammer against my brain. The room spins, my thoughts spiraling out of control until I can’t hold them back anymore. “He has him because of me!” I shout, and the room falls silent.
“I’m gonna need you to start talking real fuckin’ quick right now,” Cillian says.
“Dean?” The confusion in Aislin’s voice is like sandpaper against my heart.
I push away from the table. “My name isn’t Dean. It’s Riordan. My father used to work for Sloan. Sloan killed him, and my mom went on the run with me. When my mom died…I was fucking lost. I came here to get close to you all so I could get close to Sloan and kill him.”
I barely catch the movement in my periphery before Rory slams into me. I wasn’t expecting it, so he takes me down easily, my body hitting the ground, him on top of me. “You’ve been fucking lying to him,” he spits.
“No. I mean, yes and no. Tiernan knows. And I wasn’t going to do it anymore. I love him. I put my need for revenge aside because I fucking need him…but this has to do with me. I know it. I fucking feel it.” I don’t even try to fight Rory. I deserve whatever hate he has for me. It’s shooting daggers at me through his eyes right now. “I fucked up. Hate me all you want, kill me later if you need to, but I need to fucking find him, and I need to make this right.”
“Rory, get off him,” Aislin says.
“Fuck that. How can we believe a word he says?” Rory growls.
“We can’t,” she replies, squashing my heart beneath her words. “But he can help us find him. I can’t deal with this right now. The most important thing is getting Tiernan back.” Without another word, she walks out of the room.
“You’re fucking dead,” Rory threatens, then gets up and follows her.
“This whole time,” Cillian says, “I didn’t want to trust you, and you proved me right. I fell for it too. I thought you were good for him, but all you did was betray him, and now you’re going to get him killed…maybe get all of us killed. If Sloan knows who you are, he’s going to consider it a betrayal from us all.”
Cillian leaves, and I’m alone again. My eyes blur, and I swipe my tears away before sitting back at the table and getting to work.
*
I’ve been at it alone for the past two hours. None of them came in to see me.
And I can’t blame them. For the first time since I was four years old, I’ve known what it’s like to have family—more family than just my mom, at least—and I hurt them all. Everything that’s happened is my fault.
The letters on the screen are beginning to blur, but then… “Holy fuck.” I look around the room, ready to tell Aislin, Cillian, and Rory that I found him, but of course no one is there.
The green dot blinks on the screen. He’s close, only about forty-five minutes away. For a moment I consider telling them, but the last thing I need is to risk getting them hurt too. There’s a very good chance I’m walking into a trap. If they think Tiernan is there, I won’t be able to stop Rory, Cillian, and Aislin from going.