Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 97037 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 485(@200wpm)___ 388(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97037 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 485(@200wpm)___ 388(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
Jett is a Grade A man. He exudes sex and probably knows how to bring a woman to orgasm without even touching her. He wouldn’t be okay with a pump and dump once a month. No, not with the way he looks at me. I’m pretty sure he’ll want me on my back more than standing, and it’d feel wrong to go there with him but not be there with him. I want so badly to believe that I would be present, but could I? I stop skating as my gut warms and my clit throbs. It’s as if she’s trying to tell me that she isn’t broken. That she wants him.
But can I trust her?
I’m a thirty-eight-year-old woman, and I feel like I don’t even know myself right now. Is this part of my impostor syndrome? Does he exude so much sex that I want to do the same? For him?
Why am I overthinking this?
I cover my face with my hands when the tears burn in my eyes. I inhale deeply as my heart pounds in my chest, and the confusing feelings overwhelm me. This is why I didn’t want to come home. I feel entirely too much here. I care too much about the Ice Thistle, about getting the community to like me. I work so hard to make sure the girls I teach are getting everything they want from the experience. I spend time with Kitty, even if it’s only to sit beside her and hand her thread. I go to games because she wants me there when I’d rather be in my blanket burrito. I move forward, and I want so badly for all these feelings, even the dirty ones, to be real.
Because I care so much for Jett, and it terrifies me to let him down.
I don’t mean just on the sex part—that’s a whole clusterfuck in and of itself. I mean in general. I am here to make the Ice Thistle even better. But what if I can’t? I know he wants to skate with me because it will make Kitty happy, but what if it’s too much on him? What if I’m asking for more than I should? He owes me nothing, but he seems to be present at every turn, wanting to be there for me.
It’s all just so much.
It isn’t until a pair of arms wraps around me that I realize I’m not alone. I jump as I lift my face from my hands, my eyes meeting Jett’s kind brown ones. His brows pull in as he swipes his thumbs along my cheeks, wiping away all the tears I hadn’t realized had fallen. He then wraps his arms around me even tighter, my body going flush to his and my face burrowing into his chest. Oh God, I missed his hugs. He leans his chin on my head, and my eyes drift shut as everything settles.
My thoughts never really stop, but in his arms, I can just be without them taking over.
Jett presses a soft kiss to the crown of my head, and then against my hair, he whispers, “I’ve got you.”
I almost come undone in his arms. I cling to him as I nuzzle my nose into his neck, and the moan that comes from the back of his throat has me burning from head to toe. His thumbs rub circles along my hips as he holds me, and I’ve never felt so safe in my life. His scent intoxicates me as I inhale him greedily, needing it to steady me.
And he holds me.
For what seems like forever, when really, it’s only a minute or two. When I feel somewhat steady, I pull back to look up at him, and his eyes are filled with apprehension. “Tell me what’s going on in that head, princess.”
My lip quivers as I clench my fingers in the front of his hoodie, still needing his support. My voice is rough as I admit, “Inside is a storm. I just can’t let it out.”
I don’t want to unload on him. It’s all too much, and I refuse to let anyone else carry my burdens. His eyes darken as he gathers me closer. “Let it out, princess. I’ll weather it with you.”
A sob rips from my throat as my heart skips at his words, and our eyes stay locked. No one has ever reacted that way to my saying, but I should have known that Jett would. “It’s a lot.”
“I can handle it.” He squeezes my chin. “I can handle you.”
Tears spill over my cheeks again, and I can’t look away. A blush fills his cheeks like he hadn’t meant to throw those words out there, but they are in the air now, and they’re mine.
I never want to let them go. Let him go. But is that a reality for us?