Total pages in book: 108
Estimated words: 104657 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 523(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104657 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 523(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
“She’s too smart for you,” Fitz says with a smirk, repeating what has been my mantra forever.
Still, it doesn’t stop me from worrying. “What seemed off about her?” I ask Jamie.
“She said she was a fraud. When I asked what she meant, she said she had to go.”
Despite the dozen follow-up questions on the tip of my tongue, I say nothing because I’ve hit my emotional capacity for the day, maybe for my lifetime. If she texted me back or answered my calls, I could ask her why she went to see my father. It makes no sense that she would visit a stranger on his deathbed like that.
“I wonder if psychiatrists and therapists are well-rounded people, or if they are the most troubled people,” Maren asks.
“Did you know there’s a phenomenon known as the wounded healer?” Jamie asks.
“You’re such a nerd,” Fitz says before kissing her head.
She elbows him. “Takes one to know one. Anyway, Carl Jung believed that wounded people, or those with troubled pasts, are more likely to pursue professions in mental health. Their experience or trauma makes them more empathetic.”
“So Everleigh has a troubled past?” Maren asks before sipping her drink.
“Who doesn’t have a troubled past?” Fitz deadpans.
“Amen,” Ozzy says.
“I mean, she’s a prodigy,” Jamie says. “That alone could have caused her emotional trauma. Imagine that kind of pressure? And she didn’t have a traditional upbringing. Her time was not only divided between two parents but also between two continents.”
“Can you imagine being thrust into an adult’s world as a child?” Maren asks. “Has she ever mentioned having friends? Boyfriends? Any sort of social life? Has she ever gone trick-or-treating? It’s worse than being homeschooled.” She winks at Jamie and Fitz because they were homeschooled.
Fitz responds with the middle finger, but Jamie just giggles.
This is nice. As I listen to them, the grief I feel from losing my father lessens. Maybe I don’t have to be crushed by his loss. But they won’t be here forever. Before long, I’ll be alone with my mom.
“She’s a good person,” Jamie says. “I wish we had brought her into our circle before she moved in with Will. Everyone just wants to fit in and find people who make them feel included and who will have their backs. Ya know?” She eyes Fitz, waiting for him to back her up.
Like a good husband, he returns a loving smile and a tiny nod.
“That’s on me,” I say without thinking. My confession gains everyone’s attention.
Maren’s gaze feels the heaviest.
Bowing my head, I exhale. “After what happened between us eleven years ago, I convinced myself I hated her . . . almost as much as I loved her. As I love her.” I laugh a little, but I can’t look at them, not yet. “My dad would have been just as enamored of her. He would have said, ‘Now you know why I married your mother.’ He was drawn to anyone who had a story to tell. Mom had a story. She lost her parents before she turned sixteen. She helped raise her siblings. Put herself through college. And she never lost faith that one day she’d find someone to love and who would take care of her the way she took care of everyone else for years. Everleigh has a story. And I hope the best is yet to come. She deserves a storybook ending.”
Silence.
I risk a glance up at my friends. Maren and Jamie have tears in their eyes. Ozzy doesn’t make eye contact at all.
“Then give it to her,” Maren says. Jamie chokes on a sob, but she does it with a smile and a sappy sparkle of hope in her eyes.
“My mom needs me,” I say.
No one argues because they know it’s true.
“Then let her go. Problem solved,” Fitz says, guiding Jamie to stand with him.
“Let her go?” Jamie’s jaw drops. “Let. Her. Go? That’s your solution? Because that’s what you did to me?”
“Yep.” He grabs her face and kisses her head. “See how that worked out for us?”
“Calvin Fitzgerald”—she scowls—“that’s terrible advice.”
“You know what’s good advice?” He looks around the room. “Letting Will and his family have some time alone. It’s been a long day.”
On his cue, Maren and Ozzy stand.
I lumber to my feet, not expecting something so simple to feel this hard. My friends give me hugs. As long as I don’t try to speak, I can keep my shit together. I love them like family.
“Don’t let her go,” Jamie whispers in my ear. Then she rests her hand on my cheek. “But if you do, you’ll be fine. And so will she.”
With a hard swallow, I nod and force a smile.
Fine. Not good. Not amazing. Just fine.
But what if I’m not?
Chapter Forty-Two
I try to properly grieve. Whatever that means. Hold my mom’s hand? Reminisce about my father? Contemplate my life? But no one gives me a chance. My sister heads home less than twenty-four hours after the funeral. And my mom packs her suitcase the following morning.