Total pages in book: 140
Estimated words: 137144 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 137144 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
Sheesh.
“You said if there was something that we couldn’t tell each other, that we could say.” There, she’d found the loophole, and now they could just go back to sleep, she hoped. Or, at least, she’d do a better job of pretending to sleep this time.
“Ahh, no, that only applies to me. Not you.”
“What?” she said. “What do you mean that only applies to you? That’s not fair.”
“No one said that all the rules were fair, baby. They’re just the way they are. You have to be completely honest with me. Especially when it’s something that affects you, that worries you, concerns you, upsets you, scares you, then you have to tell me it all. Now, tell me what’s going on.”
“I don’t think I like these rules,” she said.
“I don’t like that you’re not telling me what’s going on in that head of yours, and why you’re finding it hard to sleep.”
“I’m turned on, all right,” she cried before she could stop herself.
Then she groaned. Oh my God, why had she said that? What kind of an idiot was she? Lying on her stomach, she buried her face in her pillow.
“Lily, hey, come out of there. You won’t be able to breathe.”
Unfortunately, this time he was wrong. She could definitely breathe. Much as she wished she could pass out from asphyxiation.
She just wanted to maybe faint for a little bit and lose her memory.
“Lily, turn and look at me.”
She scooched down the bed, hiding under the covers.
“Lily, come out of there,” he commanded.
“Nope. I don’t know who Lily is. My name is Billy and I live here.”
“You live under the bed covers?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“And your name is Billy?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Why is that? Because you’re embarrassed that you’re turned on? You know that everyone gets turned on, right? I’d be more worried if you didn’t get turned on.”
“Yes, but I didn’t have to blurt it out like that, did I? That was the embarrassing part.”
“You think it’s embarrassing to tell me that you’re turned on? I think it’s flattering as hell.”
“What?” she asked.
“I’m flattered that you’re turned on from kissing me. At least, I’m hoping that’s what you’re turned on from. If you tell me you had a sexy dream about another man, then we might have another conversation.”
“No. Of course I wasn’t thinking of anyone else. One sexy man in my life is enough. I don’t need to dream about anyone else. It was kissing you. It was touching you. It was everything about you.”
“Was?” he asked. “So, you’re not turned on anymore?”
“Of course I’m still turned on,” she said. “How could I not be with you right next to me?”
“Good to know,” he said.
“I guess I’m just not used to it. I can’t remember the last time I was this turned on. I’m not sure I ever have been.”
“Have you ever used toys on yourself?”
“I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to the way you talk,” she said. “How can you say those things so casually?”
“Talking about arousal and sex and getting off is not something to be ashamed of. It’s normal, it’s natural, and it’s fucking sexy. And now you can use me to get off. You can use my finger and tongue and cock as much as you like. Once you’re ready, that is. No pressure.”
Right. And when would she be ready? She wasn’t sure. How would she know?
“I don’t know how I’ll know when I’m ready,” she said. “That sounds really stupid, doesn’t it?”
“That’s not stupid at all, baby,” he replied. “I think you’ll just know.”
“And in the meantime, I don’t sleep,” she said dryly.
“Hmm. That is a good point. You do need your sleep. Shall we buy you a toy?” He reached back for his phone and started typing something into it.
“A toy?” she asked. “What do you mean by . . . oh my God, you mean a sex toy?”
Without thought, she slapped the phone out of his hand. He stared at her in surprise, while she gaped at the phone in shock.
“Oh, shoot. I didn’t mean to do that. Sorry.”
“I take it you don’t want a toy,” he said dryly.
“No, of course I don’t.”
“Why not? Did you not have one before?”
“No. Could you imagine me trying to buy a sex toy? What on earth would my mother say?”
“How would she know?” he asked.
“Because she got all of my credit card statements, of course. I wasn’t supposed to spend anything that she didn’t agree to.”
“You didn’t have your own money?”
She shrugged, feeling slightly ashamed by this topic. “Well, I’ve never really had a job, have I?”
“But surely you had some money?” he asked.
She shook her head. This was getting more and more embarrassing. She curled up into herself, holding her bent legs to her chest.
“No, I didn’t have any money of my own.”
“Every girl should have a sex toy.”