Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 66997 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 335(@200wpm)___ 268(@250wpm)___ 223(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66997 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 335(@200wpm)___ 268(@250wpm)___ 223(@300wpm)
“Thank you.” I whispered back.
I snatch the note from the table and open it quickly.
One line written in perfect black ink, structured, expensive looking.
Congrats, you made it through traffic. See? Frogger wasn’t so bad. You’re even smiling today--shame.
My blood turns to ice. Did his handwriting really need to be that nice still? And did he really need to draw a heart and a frog that looks like Kermit when he knows I like frogs? I’m still shaken up from the email and from him and just everything.
A chair scrapes loudly behind me, and I whip around so fast my sketchbook crashes to the floor.
Everyone stares while heat rushes to my face. I’m sure I have blotches on my skin and look guilty for no reason. “Sorry. I barely choke out the word and crouch to grab my things when I feel someone behind me.
A hand reaches out. It’s his. I would recognize that hand anywhere. He’s holding a pencil out to me. I quickly snatch it. He’s here, he’s been here watching me slowly lose my mind, but for how long?
I look up. “Thanks.”
He nods. “Anytime.”
He turns and leaves.
Wait was he just seeing if I’d read the note? Or was he following me? And why is he just walking out of the room? Did he have something to say?
He seems unfazed.
Uninterested.
“Class,” Someone says from the front. “Today I’ll be your adjunct professor while the new hire gets his things in order,” He checks his watch. “He was supposed to drop by, but until then, I’d like to deal with the elephant in the room. Campus wide email was hacked earlier this afternoon, if you’re being threatened by anyone or anything please go directly to campus security and the admissions office, we’re trying to deal with this silly threat of the Dean’s List as much as we can. We have suspicions that it’s a hack trying to gain sensitive information from students. Please know, if you are asked to do anything dangerous or hand over personal information, the school would never ask that of you. Keep vigilant and focus on your studies. Let the police do their job in getting to the bottom of these baseless threats.”
A hand shoots up. “But what about Professor Evans? He was on the list and—”
“—Did you see the list?” Our new adjunct professor asks. The guy shakes his head. “Thought so, it’s all speculation and rumor. Focus on your studies, things like this tend to die down fast once we know what the person wants. Now, if you’d all pay attention I’m going to go over the notes left for your final sculptures…”
I try to pay attention, but after five minutes it’s useless, instead, I trace the frog that Jude drew with my pencil over and over again and when I’m asked what my sculpture will be I blurt out: “The Princess and the Frog.”
Like an idiot.
And like an even bigger idiot, for some stupid reason, the idea of that as my final sculpture makes me smile.
9
“Some men forgive. Some men forget. Others study the wound until it becomes a map.” –The Count of Monte Cristo
JUDE
Ifollow her to the apartment. She's looking over her shoulder.
Again.
And again.
And again.
A smile tugs at my mouth.
Shit.
I really am in her head. It’s a strange position to be in when for years all I wanted was to be in her arms, in her bed.
It didn't even take much to let her thoughts become obsessive about me, at least I have that going for me after the shitshow that was last night. I still can’t figure out if she’s a really good liar or if she didn’t know about the money and my mom. If the latter is true then my dad did me dirty for not just half my life but my entire life. Good thing I’m going to annihilate his entire dynasty. I tilt my head, is she crying? She swipes at her cheek and seems to give herself a pep talk.
Which means the guilt must be eating her alive.
Good.
Let it.
Let her choke on it the same way I have for years.
Guilt I couldn't save her.
Guilt I was too late.
Guilt I missed every sign because I was too focused on my own shit.
Guilt that I didn't know.
Guilt can go fuck itself.
I stay far enough back that she won't catch my cologne. Made that mistake already and regretted it for throwing me off my plan and her off her axis a bit too soon.
Amazing what the body remembers.
Certain scents.
Certain touches.
Certain people.
For years she was the one thing that made the noise in my head stop. Her voice, the way it would roll over me and comfort me, though it was a pathetic stand-in for what I used to have, her in my arms, in my bed. At least I still had her voice since I could no longer stand the person or trust she wouldn’t knife me in my sleep.