Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 92547 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 463(@200wpm)___ 370(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92547 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 463(@200wpm)___ 370(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
“I really appreciate your kindness,” I told Effie. “But I need to find another place to stay. You and your dad deserve privacy.”
Without looking at Evan again, I offered Effie one last smile before retreating to the room where I’d dumped my things earlier. After closing the door, I leaned my back against it, taking a moment to find my bearings. In the privacy of this room, it all started to hit me. Evan Freaking Ricci. Somehow, during the handful of visits home over the years, I’d managed to avoid him. This felt like some sort of cruel joke. And of course he had to be even more handsome. He’d always had that gorgeous face, but had he always been so damn muscular? And those veiny forearms? Those might just be a weakness I didn’t know I had. He was every male characteristic I’d ever been attracted to rolled into one. God, I hadn’t been prepared in the least for thirty-four-year-old Evan. I hoped I hadn’t stared at him for too long.
To my surprise, I was able to sneak out the door without seeing Evan or Effie again. They’d apparently disappeared into their respective bedrooms. Relief coursed through me as I took in a deep breath of the cool air outside. I got in the car and leaned my head against the seat for a minute.
After I finally started the engine and began driving through town, I noticed just how much hadn’t changed here in Dry River. The hardware store. The same brick buildings on Main Street, the exterior of my high school. A feeling of nostalgia and a bit of sadness washed over me. As much as all of these things were the same, so much in my life was different. I had no home here anymore. It was a strange experience to feel unwelcome in the place that still held such a big piece of my heart.
I spent the next hour visiting each motel in town to try to find a room. Not a single one had a vacancy. Still driving around, but with no destination in sight, I called my friend Liz back in Chicago to vent. I put the phone on speaker as it rang through the car.
“Hey!” she answered. “Are you settled?”
“You’re never going to believe this…” I scoffed as I drove over the railroad tracks.
I’d never spoken about Evan to Liz—or to anyone in Chicago, for that matter. But for the next several minutes, I tried my best to summarize the situation.
“He was living with your family, supposedly like an older brother to you, and you fell for him?” Liz said when I paused to take a breath. “That sounds messy.”
It was messy. No one had a clue how close he and I had come to blurring the lines between us. My parents and sister had probably assumed I’d viewed Evan like a brother. But it was never like that for me.
“Our relationship was pretty intense, even if it wasn’t sexual,” I explained with a sigh. “We were close. I had feelings for him—strong ones. And he…well, let’s just say, he knew it, but he didn’t reciprocate.”
“He didn’t return your feelings, or he just didn’t act on anything?”
The answer to that question had haunted me over the years. I’d never been sure which it was—or why Evan had rejected me.
“I’m five years younger than he is, but that wasn’t necessarily a deterrent,” I answered. “At the time things shifted in our relationship, I was about to leave for college, and he was just starting his job at the power plant here. After I left town, I heard he started dating someone around a year later. Then eventually, he got married and had a kid.” Even after skipping some important parts of the story, my chest hurt from thinking about my first real heartbreak.
“What are you going to do tonight?” Liz asked. “I can’t believe there’s not a single place to stay in town.”
“I truly don’t know.”
“And you won’t consider staying with your dad?”
“No.” My hands tightened around the steering wheel. “I’d rather book a flight and go back to Chicago than do that.”
“What if you took the little girl up on her offer and stayed with them, just until you could find something else?”
I had to chuckle at that. Her offer—not his.
“While that was very sweet of her, I don’t think she’s the one in charge, and believe me, Evan doesn’t want me there. He didn’t say a word when she mentioned it. That told me everything I needed to know.”
“Why would he not want you to stay if there’s an extra room?”
Where to even begin with that… “We’re not currently on the best of terms.”
“Why, though? It’s been so long.”
I sucked in a breath. “For starters, I got drunk one night in college and wrote him a letter. My therapist at the time had suggested I do that to let out my feelings. She’d encouraged me to write it, even if I didn’t end up sending it.” I paused, cringing at the thought. “Because I chose to write it while intoxicated, though, my judgment was off, and I decided to mail it, too. It was pretty mean, and I’ve regretted it ever since. At the time, I was still angry about his rejection. Unfortunately, there’s no way to take it back.”