Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 89324 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 447(@200wpm)___ 357(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89324 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 447(@200wpm)___ 357(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
“Tate…” she moaned.
I fucking loved when she said my name.
“Come, baby. It’s okay.”
Her muscles pulsed around me as I thrust into her a final time. We’d had several orgasms together on this trip, but for me, this one was the most intense. I came in what seemed like an endless flow, and I never wanted to pull out of her—ever.
But after a minute, I eased out and went to discard the condom, returning to the warmth of the bed.
“Let’s not sleep tonight,” she said, wrapping her arms around me.
I nodded. “You read my mind.”
Chapter 15
* * *
TATE
If I’d had a gun, I would’ve shot that damn alarm. We hadn’t planned on sleeping, but I’d set the alarm just as a precaution. Good thing, too, as Blair and I had dozed off in each other’s arms sometime in the middle of the night.
“Oh my God.” Her hair was a beautiful mess as she blinked. “We fell asleep.”
“Yeah…” I said somberly.
She reached out to touch my face as we stared at each other.
I exhaled. “I thought I could do this, but now that this day is here…”
There were those words again, at the tip of my tongue, ready to beg her to run away with me. I tried to talk to myself.
You can’t be selfish.
She needs to live her life.
You have work to do on yourself that you can’t involve her in.
A relationship was never part of the deal.
Let her go.
Let her go.
I knew I’d regret not writing her a letter like she had me. There was just no time left. I’d spent every waking moment with her until sleep took us.
“I’ve got to get downstairs,” she said. “My ride is scheduled to come in ten minutes.”
Her flight was two hours earlier than mine, and we’d decided to part ways here to spare ourselves the stress of a dramatic airport goodbye.
My heart raced, even as it felt like it was breaking.
Blair rushed around the room to gather her things without making eye contact. When she finally looked at me, I saw tears in her eyes.
Fuck. She didn’t want me to see that she was crying.
I felt my own eyes water. It surprised me how little control I had.
She shook her head and looked down. “I don’t want you to come downstairs with me, Tate. It’s just too hard. Let’s end it here.”
No.
This can’t be it.
I had to act fast. Reaching out my hand, I said, “Give me your phone.”
She handed it to me, and I entered my number.
“I know we said this would be the end. But if you ever need me, for anything, even just to talk, call me. Please. Okay? Anytime. You don’t need to give me your number, and honestly, I wouldn’t trust myself with it. But I feel better knowing you have mine, that the ball is in your court. Even if years go by, I don’t care where I am or what I’m doing, I’ll always be here for you.”
“Okay.” She nodded. “That means a lot. And I will take you up on that.” She let out a breath. “I do feel better having your number. So, thank you.”
I tugged at my hair. “Got everything?”
“Everything but you…” She sighed.
Letting out a long, shaky breath, I nodded. “I feel that, baby. I feel that so hard.”
When she reached up and kissed me one last time, I realized just how much our emotions impact our bodies. Normally I would’ve hardened instantly as her body pressed against mine, with the feel of her lips and her taste. But now my entire body felt numb. Dead inside. Sadness had overtaken me, paralyzed me. Fuck, my eyes were watering again. I hoped by some miracle she wouldn’t notice.
The moment she pulled back, though, she swiped a finger under my eye, catching a tear. “You really do care about me.”
I took her hand in mine. “Probably more than you’ll ever realize.” I pulled her in for one last painful moment, feeling my heart break more with each passing second. Hugging her tighter than I’d ever hugged anyone, I felt her tears on my face. Or were they mine?
She forced herself back and sucked in a breath. “I’m gonna rip the Band-Aid off now.”
Sniffling, I nodded as she turned away from me.
And that was it.
I watched as she walked down the hall. It took every ounce of my energy to keep from chasing after her. I had to tighten every muscle in my body to keep myself in place.
Then she was out of sight.
Gone.
In a daze, I closed the door and sat on the edge of my bed with my head in my hands, trying to talk myself off the virtual ledge.
You did the right thing for her.
While I wouldn’t have been right for her, I couldn’t see how Blair would’ve been bad for me in any way, shape, or form. The only thing I supposed was that having a soon-to-be twenty-year-old girlfriend might’ve given my son even more reason to despise me. But I would’ve risked that if I didn’t truly believe being with me was harmful to Blair in the long term. Doing the right thing didn’t make this any easier, though, and it didn’t fill the emptiness inside me. This feeling was completely foreign. It was the first time in my thirty-six years that I’d been heartbroken. I guess it’s never too late.