Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
She rolls her lips together, trying to suppress a smile.
“I’m going to go up to my apartment…but I’m not sure it’s the right decision. Getting fucked in front of the entire city seems like a good option right about now.”
I take a deep breath to steady myself.
I have to walk away.
She’s said she doesn’t want to sleep with me tonight.
There will be other nights.
Nights when I don’t pay for dinner and she doesn’t think there’s some kind of payback. Nights when I can take my time with her. Other perfect nights.
“Go inside, Aurora,” I say on a growl. I shove my hands in my pockets and watch as she heads into her building. The smooth, pale skin of her back is begging for my touch, and I only just resist.
For now.
ELEVEN
Deacon
I haven’t exactly been trailing the corridors looking for Aurora, but I’ve found myself out of my room this evening more than I normally am. Our kiss last night has played on a loop in my head all day.
I expected to see her on reception when I arrived back after work, but she wasn’t there. I know she’s moving around to lots of different departments, so maybe she’s switched.
I even popped into the hotel bar for a beer, which I’ve only done twice before in three years. I didn’t see her there either.
If I had her number, I could text her. Even though I shouldn’t. If she’s at work, she doesn’t need me sniffing around her. She clearly thinks that people won’t approve. She’s got a lot more to lose than I have.
The alarm on my phone goes off, indicating that it’s time for my FaceTime call with Willow. I grab my phone from my bed, turn off the alarm, and dial Gabby.
Gabby doesn’t answer, Willow does.
“Hey, dollface, how are you?”
“Hey, Daddy! I just ate dinner.”
“What did you have?”
“Broccoli. And I ate it, didn’t I, Mommy?”
I hear Gabby in the background. She sounds like she’s talking to someone. It might be the nanny or she might be on another phone. I don’t sweat it. Unless we agree in advance, there’s no one at the house other than the nanny or either one of us.
Now more than ever, I’m pleased we have that rule.
I’m being an insecure prick, but I don’t like the thought of Gabby and her boyfriend playing happy family with my daughter. I’m her family. That’s never going to change.
But if my sister’s right, and Gabby wants to change our arrangement, she’s going to want her fiancé there all the time when it’s her time of the week.
The thought makes my stomach churn. I hate to think about another man having some kind of fatherly role in Willow’s life.
Maybe if I loosened the reins a little and said that he could come and go as he pleased, it would make it more likely that Gabby wouldn’t ask to change our arrangement. Chloe thinks it’s inevitable, but maybe it’s not. Maybe we can agree that the way things are set up now still makes sense going forward.
“What else other than broccoli?” I ask, trying to stay in the moment.
“Carrots. And chicken. Daddy, I don’t like chicken.”
“Did you eat it?”
“Only a little bit. And then I had a yogurt.”
“Are you still hungry?” I ask.
She shakes her head.
“Maybe a glass of milk before bed would be a good idea.” Why am I interfering? Gabby’s got this. She’s a good mum, and anyway, the nanny is there. She’s great at her job and will make sure that Willow doesn’t go to bed hungry.
“What did you have for dinner, Daddy?”
“I’m going to have my dinner later,” I say. “Tell me about school.”
“I’m doing really well with my letters. And also gymnastics. Soon I’ll be able to do a one-handed cartwheel!”
“Wow,” I say. “I can’t wait to see. Maybe you can even teach me.”
Willow throws her head back and laughs. “You’re so silly, Daddy. You’re way too big to do a cartwheel. You have to be little. Like me.”
I screw up my face. “That’s disappointing. But I’d love to see you do a one-handed cartwheel. Will you do a hundred for me?”
“Two hundred,” she counters.
“Wow. That’s a lot of cartwheels.”
“I can do a lot, Daddy. You’ll see on Wednesday.”
“I can’t wait,” I reply.
I hear Gabby calling to Willow to go and brush her teeth. Gabby’s not cutting me off. She’s not being a bitch. It’s time for Willow to go and get ready for bed. It’s fine. It’s just, I wish I were there.
I try to tell myself that if Gabby and I were still together, I would probably spend less time with Willow than I do now. I would know Willow was with Gabby, so I would stay at work and finish off whatever it was that needed my attention. This way I’m getting to see more of my daughter, and when I’m with her, I’m fully present. But somehow, I still feel like I’m missing out.