Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
He grins at me in that way that makes my knees weak and my heart stutter.
“After dinner with Gabby and Ray, we can talk to Willow about us getting married and you moving in.”
“Okay. But I don’t want to upset her. You’ve gone from not wanting her to have any change to changing everything.”
He shakes his head. “No, not everything. I still love her, Gabby still loves her. The fundamentals are all there. And anyway, she loves you, and you two are spending more time together. She asks me all the time whether we’re going to get married.”
“She does?”
“All the time.”
“Okay, but we have time.” One new thing I’ve learned about Deacon is how impatient he is when he decides he wants something.
“We also need to have the conversation about children.”
Dread creeps up my spine. I’m so happy. Everything is so perfect. I hate to ruin everything by talking about my fertility issues.
“Do we?” I ask. I have so much with Deacon and Willow in my life, it feels selfish to think that there might be anything more for me. I know I’ll be happy until the end of time with the life Deacon and I will have with Willow.
“You’ve admitted to me that all you dreamt about as a child was being a wife and mother.”
“Things change,” I say, a little defensive.
“Right,” he says. “Have you changed your mind about having children?”
“I told you, the doctors have said it’s almost impossible.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“You know my answer,” I say. “But I don’t want to… I’m happy becoming a stepmother to Willow.”
“I’ve been doing some research,” he says. “First thing is, I would encourage you to see a specialist over here to get a second opinion.”
My heart sinks into the sofa at the idea of going through all the tests again to get the same answer. “And what happens if the second opinion is the same as the first?”
“Then we have options. Obviously there’s things like IVF, but adoption is a real option. And so is egg donation. We could even use a surrogate with an egg donor, if you’re unable to carry children.”
Mixed emotions fizz in my chest at how Deacon is approaching this. He knows I’d likely just stick my head in the sand and pretend everything’s fine. The fact is, I would love for us to have a child together. And if I can’t have children naturally, I’d like to see if there’s another way. He knows it, and so he’s pushing me, which is just what I need. It’s what I want, even though I might tell myself differently.
“I’d like to explore those options. But you’re right, a second opinion is the first step.”
He nods and presses a kiss to my cheek. “And while we’re redecorating, we can decide which room we want as the nursery.”
“Deacon,” I say. “We mustn’t get our hopes up. We don’t know if anything’s going to be possible.”
“I absolutely do know that if what we want is a child, then we can make that happen in one way or another.”
“Is that what you want?”
He pulls in a breath and cups my face. “I can’t think of anything better than building a family with you. I already have a daughter, so it might not be a conventional family, but I want Willow to be a big sister, and you to be a mother, and I want to be the father to our children.”
“I’d like that too. Very much.”
I push my fingers through his hair and press my lips to his, heat coursing through my body.
“In the meantime,” he says, flipping me so I’m on my back on the sofa, Deacon over me. “We can see if we can get you pregnant in the usual way.”
If anyone can, it will be Deacon. With his determination and single-mindedness, anything is possible.
Five Months Later
Deacon
I’ve always seen myself as a bit of a loner. I don’t know if I’ve been wrong all these years, and being with Aurora has made me see thing differently, or whether Aurora has changed me. But looking around the private dining room set up for some pre-dinner drinks at Hotel on Ninth Street, it’s entirely full, and everyone in here is an important part of my world in some way.
Aurora squeezes my hand. “Are you okay?” she asks.
“I’ve never been happier,” I reply, taking another head-to-toe glance at my beautiful fiancée. She’s wearing the most gorgeous green gown that matches her eyes and I can’t wait to peel it off her when we get home. I feel like a different person to the one who used to live part of my week here at Hotel on Ninth Street. Now I’m back, it makes me wonder why I spent so many years living here. But I guess it led me to Aurora, so I can’t be sorry for that.