Total pages in book: 180
Estimated words: 182075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 910(@200wpm)___ 728(@250wpm)___ 607(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 182075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 910(@200wpm)___ 728(@250wpm)___ 607(@300wpm)
“Is she . . . is she really going to be okay? She’s so small,” Indie said.
Far smaller than she’d expected. She looked too tiny to be real.
I need to touch her.
But as she reached out to the incubator, she realized her hand was shaking. She was still so weak. For the past two days, she’d been in a haze, drifting in and out of consciousness. She’d have moments of clarity when she knew what was going on. But mostly, she’d just felt ill and exhausted.
And now she was too broken to hold her own baby.
Slade placed his hand on her shoulder as Spencer crouched down next to her. She was surprised they were all allowed in here.
But the nurse didn’t say a word. In fact, she was looking at Indie with a mix of concern and care.
“I know this is hard and it likely isn’t what you were thinking about and dreaming of,” Anna said to her. “But you can still help your baby thrive. Have you decided on a name?”
A name?
For the baby?
God. Why didn’t she have a name for her baby? She was the worst mother ever.
“Hey, you don’t have to have a name yet,” Quaid said. “We can look at different names. We can google it or find a book. Whatever you need.”
She looked up at him as he gazed at her worriedly. Then she moved her gaze back to her baby. And it just hit her.
She knew exactly what to name her.
“Hope,” she whispered.
“What, Boo?” Slade asked.
“Her name is Hope. My Christmas Day miracle. The reason why I left him. Why I kept fighting to survive. She’s my Hope.”
“Hope is the perfect name,” Spencer said quietly.
They all reached out to touch her. Slade with his hand on her shoulder. Spencer, squeezing one leg, Rock the other.
Quaid moved behind her to rub her neck.
“Would you like to touch her?” Anna asked.
Um. What kind of question was that?
“Yes. But I don’t want to hurt her,” she said.
“We’ll make sure you don’t,” Anna said. “Let’s just wash your hands and arms.”
Slade wheeled her over to the sink and Anna helped her get ready. “Hope’s skin is thin and she will be very sensitive. So I wouldn’t stroke her. Instead, she needs to feel contained. Place your hands gently over her.”
Slade wheeled her back and Indie waited for the nurse to open the portholes. Then she reached through. She was still shaking but determined to do this.
The room was silent except for the machines around Hope. The guys all stood by, just watching. She was glad they were there but also that they were letting her have this moment with her baby.
Indie placed her hand lightly on Hope’s legs and head. Tears dripped down her cheeks as relief filled her. Comfort and love flooded her, warming her from the inside out.
She could hear her heart beating on the monitor, but now she could feel it as well. Her little body, her soft skin.
“I think she knows her mama is here,” Anna said. “She looks more relaxed and her heart rate is more stable. Good job, mama.”
Good job.
There were times she hadn’t believed that she could do that. When she’d despaired of being a good mum to her baby. But in this moment, she knew that she would do whatever it took to keep Hope safe and happy.
Indie would never let anyone or anything harm her.
The four of them stood staring down at the tiny baby in the incubator.
Indie was asleep on the recliner finally.
She was exhausted and needed her sleep. It had been less than a week since Hope had been born and Indie was still recovering as well.
“She’s so tiny,” Spencer said. “How do we even touch something that small without hurting her?”
“Very carefully,” Quaid told him.
“No kidding,” Spencer replied.
“We have this,” Slade told them. “We will learn how to take care of her and we’ll keep looking after Indie.”
“I should get her to bed,” Quaid said.
But like the other three, he was having trouble tearing himself away from the tiny baby in the incubator.
It seemed impossible that she could be that small. And Quaid could see the fear in the other’s faces, despite Slade’s attempt to be reassuring.
They were all scared of hurting this tiny human who was relying on them.
“I’m going to set up a schedule,” Slade said. “We’ll take it in turns to stay here.”
“I want to be here all the time,” Spencer protested.
Slade shot him a look. “We all want that. But we also need to make sure that we rest and eat so we’re in fighting form to take care of Indie and Hope.”
Quaid understood that. But like Spencer, he couldn’t imagine tearing himself away.
Rock’s fingers moved and Quaid tried to his best to understand him, but his sign language was still rusty.
“He said he’s not touching Hope,” Spencer told them.