Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 78334 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 313(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 78334 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 313(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
“Shocking,” she deadpans, and then her expression softens almost maternally as she gestures to the bags. “I like to keep them in essentials. They’re good at what they do, but they forget they’re human. I cook sometimes too. Tonight I’m doing a big lasagna so if you’re still here, you should eat with us.”
It’s such a simple invitation, and it hits me oddly hard, because I can’t remember the last time someone offered me a home-cooked meal. I’m a workaholic, don’t have many friends and I don’t have the best relationship with my mother, who rarely fed me anything more than mac and cheese when I was growing up.
“Thank you,” I say, and mean it. “But I’m staying at my house tonight, and well… every night thereafter.”
Anna chuckles. “I understand Cole is on protective detail and the man needs to eat. So let him bring you here for a dinner, and then you can hunker down in your house after.”
It’s the home-cooked part that gets me. It’s not that I can’t cook for myself, but her invitation suggests a level of family intimacy I find appealing. I didn’t have that growing up. My mom was single with a horrible addiction to horrible men. For the first time in my life, I got the sense of what family is all about when Cole and I fell in love. We celebrated holidays and dinners with his parents and siblings, who welcomed me into the fold. It hurt to let all that go as much as it did to lose him.
“I’d like that,” I find myself saying, committing to the event tonight. Not sure how Cole will feel about that, though.
Anna studies me for a second, then nods toward the hallway I came from. “You and Cole were together before, right?”
I blink. So much for small talk and secrecy. “Yes,” I admit, deciding it’s not an awful secret. It’s not like we had a horrible breakup. More like a mutual but painful decision.
“And now you’re here,” she says, as if stating a fact she’s decided to weigh. “Working a case together. Living under the same roof.”
“Except I’m going back to my house today,” I remind her, because it feels necessary, like a guardrail.
Anna chuckles. “If you think you’re going to be there alone, you better think again. Malik assigned Cole to protection, which means he doesn’t leave your side. Hope you have a spare bedroom set up.” Her eyes twinkle mischievously. “Bet it’s weird after being apart. How long were you together?”
She makes it easy to pause, and I end up sliding onto a backed stool at the island while she puts groceries away. I tell myself it’s a brief rest before the gym. “We split up about five years ago and were together just over two before that.”
Anna glances back from the open refrigerator. “How did it end?” she asks, her tone gentle rather than intrusive.
My first instinct is to deflect. To joke. To brush it off. But in the quiet of this communal space, with the sound of bags crinkling and her kind eyes, I relax.
“We broke up because of my job,” I say, and I hear how clinical it sounds even as my chest tightens. “He couldn’t handle the danger, and I couldn’t promise to stop walking into it.”
Anna’s hands pause on a carton of eggs. She looks at me then, really looks. “And what was your part in it?”
I swallow. “I chose my career.”
“Do you regret it?” she asks bluntly, but not with any censure.
No. That’s the answer I want to give. Sharp and clean. But the truth is more complicated.
“I don’t regret my career,” I say carefully. “I love what I do and I’m good at it. I’ve helped people by what I do and that fulfills me. But I… I didn’t understand what it cost him to love someone like me back then.”
Anna nods, as if she already knows that kind of love. “And now?”
I exhale slowly, letting my gaze drift to the hallway that leads to Cole’s apartment, and the fact that my eyes go there without thinking tells me everything.
“Now I understand why he drew the line,” I admit. “Especially since I’ve found myself in a very dangerous situation.” I blow out a sigh. “It feels surreal, looking back, that we were perfect in every other way and we still couldn’t compromise on the one thing that mattered most.”
“Sounds like you still care,” Anna says simply.
My throat tightens again, and I hate it. I hate how easily his name rearranges me. “He was the love of my life and I let him go.”
Anna’s expression softens. “Maybe you didn’t let him go. Maybe you both needed to become different people first.”
I shake my head faintly, because hope is a dangerous drug. “I don’t think this is some second-chance romance, Anna. I intend to keep my career, and Cole… Cole is still Cole. He still frets over me.”