Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 83430 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83430 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
My hands shake as I worry them together. I nod grimly, looking at my shoes. Count to ten and keep it together. One, two, three… But that barely helps. My cheeks are red with anger and shame, and I feel the walls of the room shifting closer, trying to constrict me. Our house is big and beautiful, it’s in a wonderful neighborhood, I’ve been given the best education and allowed access to some of the most exclusive parties in all of Baltimore, but none of that matters.
Not when it feels like the rugs are going to wrap around my throat and suffocate me at any moment.
Papa lifts his paper and returns to reading. I spin on my heel and get the heck out of there before I can make my situation even worse.
I hurry to the kitchen. My head’s pulsing already and I need coffee. I get a mug and fill it, and only notice Annie when she plops herself on the counter beside me, socked feet kicking.
“Well? How’d that go?”
I try to ignore her. “Good morning to you too.”
“Did he yell at you?”
“I’m hungry. Do we have any English muffins left?”
“I bet he threatened to do something terrible. Big, scary Papa and his horrific punishments.” Annie waggles her eyebrows, grinning, and I want to slap her across the face. She thinks our father’s temper is some big joke because he never turns it on her. But if she were the one shoved on a bed as his belt cracked across her shoulder blades enough to leave bloody welts—
Coffee spills and burns my hand. I curse, put the mug down, and clean up the spill. “I’m fine,” I say, straightening with as much dignity as I can muster. “Everything’s fine, okay?”
Annie gets off the counter and touches my shoulder. “Hey, Tallie, I’m sorry. Really, I’m not being nice. I’m sorry.”
I wring a towel miserably and breathe through my nose. “He’s not going to change his mind.”
“No, he’s not. Believe me, I tried.”
I look up in surprise. “Really? He said you didn’t.”
She snorts and hugs me tightly. “Then he lied. The night I found out, I cried and begged him to change his mind. I said horrible things about Leon and I hadn’t even met him yet. In the end though, I got past it.”
“How?” I feel like the word is a curse, a deep black well with no bottom at all, no water to sink me, no ground to stop my fall. I don’t want the answer, but I also need something to hold on to, no matter how much I’ll hate it.
“I realized it won’t change. No matter what I did, Papa wouldn’t budge an inch. You know how he is.” She pulls back, holding my shoulders. “This is what we are, right? Sam, Davit, Gor, Hov, all our brothers are trapped in their own ways, like we are.”
“Miriam and Tate got away.”
“Tate’s miserable working some dead end job to keep her lights on and Miriam’s pumping out little brats for that loser doctor she married. Neither can ever come home, you know that. It’s not an option for us.”
I suck in a breath, trying to steady myself. I know she’s right. I hated Tate so much when she ran off. I didn’t mind Miriam so much, mostly because she’s a lot older and we weren’t close, but when Tate ditched the family it was like someone broke my arm and left it dangling by a thread of skin. I can’t imagine doing that to Annie, to Sam, especially not to poor, sensitive Davit.
Which leaves me where?
Trapped, like always.
“Morning, sisters.” Sam strides into the kitchen, throws open the fridge, and grabs the milk. He takes two chugs straight from the carton.
“Don’t be disgusting, Sam.” Annie snatches it from him and puts it back.
He doesn’t seem bothered. Not much ruffles him. “Coffee, sweet elixir of life and health.” He fills a big mug and blows on it. “What’s with you?” he asks, jutting his chin out at me.
“I’m fine.” I wipe my eyes and elbow him back.
“Were you crying? Oh god, are you upset about the whole marriage thing?”
“Stop it, Sam,” Annie says in a warning tone.
“I’m so jealous, honestly. You know Brenden McGrath’s supposed to be the best thief in the city? I’d literally murder both of you for a chance at marrying him. Can you imagine how much he could teach me?”
“You are mentally broken,” Annie snaps sharply. “Seriously twisted in the brain.”
“Tallie, please, when you’re his wife, will you talk to him for me? Ask him to teach me the trade? I’ll do anything for you. I’ll strangle Annie with her favorite high end bag! You’d love that, right?”
“I’m with Annie on this one. You’re insane.” I find the English muffins in a drawer and eat one without bothering to toast it.