Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 60481 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60481 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
“You’d better not.”
Because Sam isn’t around to get you down when you get yourself stuck.
It had been four days since we broke up, and I was barely keeping my shit together. But being a mom, I didn’t get to self-indulge in pity parties.
That was what I’d told myself all week. I pushed through, even though I could barely function. Even though everything felt empty and lonely without Sam.
The guy had barely been in my life for more than a week, but he’d changed everything.
He’d turned me inside out. Made me come alive again. Got me to open my heart.
Then broke it.
This time felt so much worse than with Ted. Ted’s breakup had hurt my pride. The idea I wasn’t worthy had deeply offended me. The fact that I was pregnant and suddenly single had been traumatic for me on top of it.
But I realized now I hadn’t actually been in love with Ted. He’d been exciting and sexy. Also, arrogant and self-centered.
Except he hadn’t been mine.
Not the way Sam had been. Ted never showed up for me the way Sam had. Ted never made me the focus of his world.
I finished checking my work on a rebuild of a Mustang GT and dropped the hood, then pulled off my latex gloves and threw them away.
“Look at me, Mommy!” JT was standing atop the tire pile, arms thrown in a victory “V”, hips waggling.
Gah.
This child would never stop scaring the crap out of me.
“How are you going to get down?” I forced patience into my voice.
“Like this!” He took a soaring leap to plant one foot on the hood of the Mustang, then pushed off it, to land with the other foot on the ground.
It was truly breathtaking and so, so dangerous. I was going to be gray by the time he went to middle school.
“No jumping on client’s cars.” I made a new rule.
He didn’t look all that contrite. “Okay. What’s for dinner? Can we get those green sandwiches, like Sam brought over?”
A tight band cinched around my chest, constricting my breath, squeezing my heart.
Had that only been a week ago that Sam had shown up with sandwiches to take us to see the foal?
Sam…
A wall of grief nearly bowled me over at the memory, and I set my hand on the workbench to brace myself.
Should I reach out?
As my shock over everything that happened at the picnic wore off, I started to wonder if I’d overreacted. Yes, the pack alpha had asked about JT, but maybe I should’ve at least talked things through with Sam before throwing it all away.
But he hadn’t called me either. That proved that he hadn’t been serious about being my mate, right? That he hadn’t shared things intentionally? That I wasn’t really going to be part of the pack?
Ugh. I had no idea. My thoughts were too tangled. Feelings too conflicted.
“Mommy?”
“Oh, the, um, pesto turkey sandwiches?” I thought quickly about my plans for dinner. “Sure, we could go pick those up.” Where had Sam said he got them? On Main?
Grief washed over me again.
Think, Clio. Apple-something deli.
Just then, right before closing, two cars pulled in–a minivan and an SUV.
Shit. I hadn’t put up the closed sign yet. Now I had to deal with customers before dinner.
I sighed and headed out to the front lot only to see Remy and Joy climb out of the passenger side of the minivan, along with Becky, a woman I’d met at the pack barbecue, who was unbuckling a two-year-old from a car seat. Another woman I recognized from the barbecue got out of the SUV and unbuckled a preschooler from the back seat.
“Remy!” JT shouted gleefully, dashing out to her at top speed. I had to put my hand on the wall to keep from being bowled over.
“Slow–oh. Nevermind,” I said, still not used to JT having friends he didn’t have to hide his true nature from.
“It’s not an ambush,” Joy called out with a smile on her face. She held up a bottle of red wine. “We brought wine!”
“And charcuterie!” said the bespectacled blonde with the preschooler who wiggled out of the car as she grabbed a grocery bag from the floor of the minivan. Audrey, if I remembered correctly. She was the wife of one of the Wolf brothers. The one who was also a rodeo star.
Joy walked over, cautiously sizing me up for my reaction.
I threw my arms around her.
“Oh, honey. I’m so sorry.” Joy squeezed me back.
God, I’d needed a friend–even if these particular friends were related to the pack that I wanted no part of.
But I wasn’t even sure if that was true anymore.
All I knew was that I was hurting and didn’t know how to stop the bleeding. Friends of any kind who I could at least talk to about the situation were welcome. At least I could speak openly with them and not eat every other word, so I didn’t mention wolf shifters.